Cover art for podcast The Faucet with Myq Kaplan

The Faucet with Myq Kaplan

101 EpisodesProduced by Myq KaplanWebsite

Comedian Myq (Mike) Kaplan is The Faucet.Except instead of water like from a literal faucet, what comes out are words, thoughts, ideas, jokes, rhymes, philosophies, fun, and more, in a stream of consciousness. A stream. Like water. See? Like this.

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February 22nd, 2024


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152: Questions From a Seven-Year-Old Future Astronaut/Comedian

February 25th, 2024


In today's pod-meal, we dig into some questions that a friend's child has asked! She is funny and creative and makes jokes and wants to be a comedian/astronaut later in life (or maybe right now) and so her mom asked me …

151: The Fall-cet!

September 24th, 2023


The Faucet returns! The summer was busy and the fall is also gearing up to be busy BUT not too busy for new Faucets! Welcome back or welcome front and thank you for being here. In today's pod-snack, Myq discusses what …

150: Liz Glazer's DEBUT ALBUM "A Very Particular Experience," Myq's NEW SPECIAL "Live From The Universe," and Other Constellation Mountains

May 20th, 2023


In today's pod-meal, our 150th episode spectacular, Liz Glazer returns to discuss her debut album out right now! 

It's called A Very Particular …

149: Myq's New Album Is Called "Live In Between Albums" and Liz Glazer Joins to Chat About It and Lots More!

March 27th, 2023


In today's pod-meal, Myq and Liz dig into "Live In Between Albums," Myq's newest widely released standup comedy album, as well as loads more topics like horses, gym equipment, impermanence, and other Buddhist topics. We …

148: Dental fLaw School with Liz Glazer!

March 9th, 2023


In today's pod-meal, the wonderful Liz Glazer once again joins Myq to discuss dentists, law professors, acting directors, and many other topics that …

147: Infinite Sets of Three Things with Liz Glazer

February 25th, 2023


In today's pod-meal, Myq and Liz cover (near-)infinite sets of three things, from bags and blankets to comic book characters, from TJ and Dave to James Corden, from books and scenes to life!, from earth and air to fire …

146: Without Further A-Doozy With Liz Glazer (Happy 7th Friendship Anniversary!)

January 7th, 2023


In today's sumptuous pod-meal, Myq and Liz celebrate seven years of friendship by continuing to be friends and talking about all kinds of things like whether or not Liz is a comedian (she is), which one of the pair is a …

145: 2022 Year In Review with Liz Glazer!

December 31st, 2022


In today's multi-course pod-meal, Myq and Liz go through their wins and downs of 2022 and right now which is still part of 2022! They both keep …

144: The Many Mentions of "Aforementioned" (a Birth-Month Journal Sharing, and more!)

November 21st, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq shares what's been going on in his life since his last extended pod-meal! Including all of his birth month! Seeing Paul …

143: The Most Famous Ghost in the World with Ryan Singer

November 1st, 2022


On today's extra-special pod-meal, Myq welcomes dear friend Ryan Singer as a guest. Ryan has a new comedy special out now called "The Supernatural" and these two friends have a great time chatting about all kinds of …

142: MY Q&A at Bucknell U & ME

October 26th, 2022


On today's extra-large pod-meal, Myq answers questions from students in a standup comedy class at Bucknell University. Enjoy! 

Do you have questions also? Feel free to ask me!
Do you have a university? Feel free to …

141: Sound Wavings (A Summary of Life Happenings From August 7 to September 29, 2022)

September 29th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq shares about everything* that's happened since the last podcast he recorded on August 7. Trips to Denver, Albuquerque, Raleigh, Miami, and more! Comedy festivals! Podcasts! Clubs! Bars! Standup! …

140: Thank you for listening, Steven Spielberg! Love, Liz Glazer and Myq Kaplan

August 7th, 2022


In today's seven-course pod-meal, Myq is joined by wonderful friend Liz Glazer WHOSE BIRTHDAY IS TODAY! Discussion topics include benign college …

138: The History of Linoleum with Liz Glazer

July 13th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq is once again joined by dear friend and co-Fauceteer Liz Glazer for discussions about comedy, linoleum, and more! Please …

137: Dancer in the Light

July 5th, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq catches everyone up with experiences of the past week, including good news at the leg doctor, TV/movie recs and non-recs (wreck-ommendations?), and mystery birthday wishes!

136: Bibbidi-Bobbidi-BOOP! (Happy 6-year Anniversary, Rini!)

June 28th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq returns to Faucet-ing from a lengthy time between Faucets. Thank you for your patience! He discusses with Rini (and Stuffles) all (or most) of the ensuing events in life between the last Faucet …

135: Wonderful as YOUsual with Liz Glazer

May 11th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq is once again joined by delightful friend and hilarious comedian Liz Glazer, as she prepares for an audition. They discuss …

134: Making History with Liz Glazer

April 28th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq once again welcomes back his dear friend Liz Glazer to discuss history, trivia, law, dreams, friendship, philosophy, and Batman.

And maybe more! Probably more! Much much more! Enjoy!

133: Miss Fortune Cookie with Liz Glazer

April 20th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq digs in with Liz Glazer on big important things and small important things! Fun and meaningful, as always. Liz is wonderful. …

132: The Hello Realms

April 7th, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares some snippets from a Buddhist lecture he heard the night before from the Venerable Robina, hopefully translating as …

131: Will You Please Pass the Goof?

March 22nd, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about the events of the past few days, full of shows and parties and books and movies and who KNOWS what else! (The …

130: 43 Years in 43 Minutes

March 16th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, Myq takes a deep dish dive into his history, sharing everything that he can about his life in the time he has allotted himself, which is about one minute for each year he's been alive. There's a lot …

129: Fool Throttle

March 6th, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about the remainder of his and Rini's drive down to Florida, with shows in WV and Charlotte along the way. Topics include magic, comedy, friendship, and more.

You know how sometimes …

128: Smart Hearts and Sweet Butts

February 22nd, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares stories of the first two days of this week's "Can I Buy a Vowel" tour (performing in WV, NC, & FL, nary a vowel to be found!). Driving cars, reading books, phoning friends, Zooming …

127: Fifty First Jokes, a George Saunders Quote, and the Can I Buy a Vowel Tour

February 19th, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares something from yesterday, today, and tomorrow! Yesterday was a show called Fifty First Jokes. Today was an exchange …

126: The Bananas Strawberry Moment

February 14th, 2022


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about a BANANAS show that he did, and the strawberry moment of that show. Please enjoy!

125: The Only Grass That There Is

February 4th, 2022


On today's pod-snack, Myq returns to solo Faucet-ing after a few delightful duo Faucet experiences with Liz Glazer. He talks about where he's been, …

124: Read 'Em and Sleep!

January 24th, 2022


On today's pod-meal, Myq invites Liz Glazer back to be a co-Faucet, because he loves her and loves talking with her. Hope you enjoy!

123: The Letter and the Spirit of Friendship with Liz Glazer

January 7th, 2022


In today's pod-meal, the first of 2022 (happy now year!), Myq has a conversation with dear friend and fellow faucet Liz Glazer, on the anniversary of the birth of their friendship. Please enjoy this delight of a chat, …

122: MY Q&A at Steel City AF

December 23rd, 2021


On today's extra-large pod-meal, Myq answers questions from other comedians at Steel City AF. Enjoy!

121: Bones, Stones, Scones, & Phones

November 17th, 2021


In today's pod-snack so large it might be a pod-meal, Myq shares about all that's been going on since the last Faucet episode dropped in late October.

There were trips to Raleigh and Maryland. There were enjoyable …

120: Wonderstanding / A Bat Is A Fallen Bird

October 25th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq discusses things that are (hopefully) kind, true, and necessary. He shares about the birds and the bats and the mice and …

119: Fam, ILY!

October 19th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq is on the phone with Rini and her mom and some cats but you can only hear Myq's side of the conversation and fortunately (!) he does nearly all the talking. The cats do the least. A delivery …

118: Food Pants Books

October 9th, 2021


In today's pod snack/meal (bigger than some snacks, smaller than some meals), Myq podcasts for the first time as a 43-year-old! He and Rini are on a …

117: Turns and Twists

September 27th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq reads a delightful email that he received and also recommends Demetri Martin and comedy/beat-boxing combinations. 

Glad …

116: The Truth-brary

September 19th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about a journey to the Strand. It's a story about books! And more. Books And More. BAM! Thanks for listening or at least reading about listening! You. Are. Nice!

115: Salem If Ya Got 'Em!

September 13th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq talks about the past week's events, including a fun trip to Salem, MA where he performed with Liz Glazer at the E.Love.Ate Festival, as well as Rini's improved health! Hooray for all! Thanks …

114: Fork Score and Several Days Ago

September 7th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq wishes everyone a happy Jewish new year, or a happy Tuesday, as you wish. He discusses his recent trip to Utah, Rini's recent trip to the ER, and more.

Alternate titles:

Our Fork-Fathers (and …

113: No One To Brain But Yourself

August 30th, 2021


This pod-snack might be the shortest pod-snack yet! Or maybe second-shortest. Or who knows. It's not a pod-shortness competition! It's just a fun …

112: Friend Expert

August 21st, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about what he's been up to this past week. Voice acting! Being tired! Doing comedy! Seeing "Your Love, Our Musical"! Enjoying friendship! More!

111: Reedy or Not

August 14th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq reports live-ish (and getting less live-ish with every passing moment) from Pittsburgh. It's a burgh but it's not the pitts! (It's enjoyable!) Please enjoy this enjoyable enjoyment.

Alternate …

110: Toe Ring Touring (The Coffee Table Tour Saga Concludes! Part 5 I Think!)

August 10th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about the final days of the tour. The last exciting shows in Minnesota. The one wonderful show in Chicago. The stop …

109: Air Book and Book (Coffee Table Tour Episode 4!)

July 30th, 2021


On today's pod-snack, Myq catches everyone up with the final days of the Missouri tour portion and the initial days of the Minnesota travel leg! Welcome! Books and friends and more galore! Some places don't give you …

108: Puzzle Puzzlings (Coffee Table Tour Installmentation 3!)

July 21st, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq catches everyone up on the last few days of the Coffee Table Tour in Missouri! It involves a lot of puzzle talk! Do you …

107: Take a Geoff Tate Break (Coffee Table Tour Part 2!)

July 17th, 2021


On today's pod-snack, Myq shares about his and Rini's second day on tour: Cincinnati, home of wonderful comedian friend Geoff Tate. Check out Geoff's …

106: The Coffee Table Tour Begins (Day 1!)

July 15th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about Day 1 of his current three-week tour with Rini from NYC to MO and MN and back! First stop: Morgantown, WV. Verdict? Success! Real fun show, real nice people, real nice vegan food, …

105: The Supposed-Ta Child

July 4th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq talks about Buddhist art, the book Visual Intelligence, a joke by friend Shane Mauss, and wisdom from a grandfather. Hope you enjoy!

104: Yelping For Joy

June 29th, 2021


On today's pod-snack, Myq talks about why there wasn't a pod-meal this weekend, because he was out of town for the first time since pre-pandemic. He recommends the used bookstore "Company of Books" in Virginia where he …


June 19th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses Gödel's Incompleteness Theorem (not completely!), wise words from old friend the Dalai Lama, and probably more who …

102: Figs Are Bananas!

June 19th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses a fun non-pod-meal that he had with his friend Jasmin Singer, a fun email exchange he had with his friend Gus, and a number of other letters combined into words combined into sentences …

101: Faucet 101

June 12th, 2021


On this pod-snack, Myq offers a brief, unnecessary Faucet 101, in honor of this being Faucet's 101th episode. Enjoy as Myq shades some light on the subject of this podcast.

100: Our 100th Episode SpectaculOUR!

June 7th, 2021


On today's pod-snack, Myq and Rini celebrate 100 episodes of this podcast by discussing a wedding they went to and how it's nice to spend a road trip. You know, a podcast! Thanks for listening. (To this, and in …

99: Technical Difficult Ease

May 29th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq shows off his new haircut as much as he can via audio. He recommends: A) Mindy Tucker who photographed the hair-cutting process, B) the Housing Works Bookstore where he walked with his friend …

98: You Say Potato, I Say Bananas

May 22nd, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses food, love, his friend Micah, his mom Mom, the book by Kate Murphy "You're Not Listening" which he highly recommends, and more.


97: Quiet as a Mouth

May 16th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq recommends a book he's reading called "You're Not Listening" by Kate Murphy. It's good! He probably says other things as well, but he doesn't remember because wasn't listening.

Love to all!

96: Potatoes Are Money / Happy Birthday Rini!

May 8th, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq wishes a happy birthday to his beloved girlfriend Rini and also to his latest album "A.K.A." which turns one year old today! …

95: A Suspecting Audience

May 1st, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq shares about his recently deceased step-sister, and also some about genies, ice cream, and elephants.

Love to all.

94: Onomatopoetry

April 24th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses Yogi Bear and other hungry cartoon animals, nature and nurture, the Zoom boom, seeing friends in the park, the similarities between humans and apes and bananas, how frozen and/or …

93: Clock Whiskers

April 16th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses several items he forgot to last time, as well as the topic of forgetfulness itself, which he may have talked about …

92: Nameless Amos

April 10th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses cookies, jokes, shapes, fame, rooms, saunas, keeping kosher, learning an instrument, teaching, cheating, the …

91: Tom After Tom

April 3rd, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq talks about history, vaccinations, cats, dogs, falcons, Golden Girls, his friend Cory Allen's podcast the Astral Hustle, and …

90: Driving Miss Baby

March 31st, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses vaccinations (he just became eligible! are you? do you know? can you help other folks find out if they are …

89: The Present-Minded Professor

March 26th, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq shares about his experience at a former professor's memorial that he attended earlier in the day. It was beautiful and …

88: Spring It On!

March 20th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses the start of spring, the anniversary of his grandmother's death, getting enough sleep, (limited and specific) gratitude to giant social media corporations, and the heat death of the …

87: Day Owl / Words With Anyone / Fun Units

March 13th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses the events of his past week (AND MORE), including (BUT NOT LIMITED TO) a conversation with a friend about death, game shows, a child's perfect joke, comments out of context, AND WHO …

86: Real IDs / Out-of-Context Comments / At Least One Hijink

March 6th, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq live-streams while recording and introduces a new segment called "out-of-context comments"! Thanks to all who listened live, and also thanks all who listen UN-live. UN-live listeners keep this …

85: Tome Poem Home Zone / Paper Clip-Clop

February 27th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq offers some jokes, some poems, and some things that transcend jokes and poems. Discussed are the wonderful works and words …

84: Beast of Buddhism

February 20th, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq recommends the works, lives, arts, friendships, dreams, and related experiences of/with Adam Busch, Liz Glazer, Ram Dass, Lyssa Mandel, Henry Phillips, Joe List, Maya Angelou, Moses Hogan, …

83: The Hallie Berry Ha! Library (Welcome to Art Nuggets)

February 13th, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq introduces the concept of "art nuggets" and shared some! As well as some new words that he learned recently that start with "o" and end with "t" and have one letter in between them. (There are …

82: Like a Moth to Two Flames

February 6th, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq shares a recommendation to see "In & Of Itself" and also to not learn too much about it or to see too many previews unless that's what you want to do (he's not your boss). Do what you want! …

81: Smullyan Simoleons

January 31st, 2021


In tonight's pod-meal, Myq shares stories about Starbucks, Barnes and Noble, the philosopher Raymond Smullyan, and more. How much more? Much much …

80: Oy Yoy Joy (On Why I Recommend My Friend Tristan Miller's Newsletter)

January 29th, 2021


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares a joyful exchange he had today with his good friend Tristan Miller, who has a newsletter that is worth receiving! He …

79: Fonzie Bear

January 23rd, 2021


On today's pod-meal, Myq discusses the various world record-breaking comedy endeavors he's been a part of, his mother's favorite standups, Muppets, non-Muppets, and more! Enjoy!

78: Variations on The Me

January 16th, 2021


On today's self-contained (?) pod-meal, Myq discusses the comfort of mysteries, his love of various Jim Carrey movies, his mother's taste in media, and more! Come for the fun, stay for the fun!

77: Tears of Light

January 15th, 2021


In today's pod snack, Myq spends most of the time recommending that you listen to his latest Broccoli and Ice Cream episode, in which his mother is …

76: Memory Patricks

January 9th, 2021


In today's pod-meal, Myq discusses memories about memory.

Also covered are things like remembering, reminding, and I forget what else.

Myq recommends the scientific and artistic entertainment creations of Dan Ariely, …

75: Primary Fruits

January 8th, 2021


On today's pod-snack, Myq discusses animals, vegetables, and minerals, except for the minerals, and more fruits than vegetables. But definitely animals! Have fun listening!

74: Rabbit Rabbit Habit

January 2nd, 2021


Happy NOW Year! In this first episode of 2021, Myq offers some year-beginning reflections. He recommends all kinds of friends and artists, including Jo Firestone and Zach Sherwin, and well, he recommends listening to …

73: Cuddle Up With Your Sentient Being of Choice and Enjoy Some Silent Fireworks

December 31st, 2020


Myq rings out the old year (or wrings it out?) in this episode, with wonderings about who might be listening on this very New Year's Eve day! Is it …

72: Proper Gander

December 26th, 2020


On today's year-end pod-meal, Myq discusses listening to holiday music all year round, making resolutions whenever, using fun vegan euphemisms, …

71: Bard to the Bone

December 20th, 2020


In tonight's pod-meal, Myq shares some poetry, recommends Codenames again, offers a week in review, and generally has a nice time that you can also have.

Alternate Titles:

Antique Country Roads Show
Faucet Auspices

70: Happy Hanukkah, Nonukkah, and Beyonukkah!

December 18th, 2020


On tonight's pod-snack, Myq celebrates the final night of Hanukkah and also the rest of everything. Enjoy please and thank you as desired and …

69: A Real Godblessit

December 12th, 2020


On today's podcast, Myq celebrates the birthday (today! December 12!) of his beloved Grandma Iris, who died earlier this year at 91. Now she's 92, or infinity. Not sure. Both?

Memories and stories and love abound. …

68: Tonight Is the First Night of the Rest of Your Life (and Chanukah!)

December 10th, 2020


On tonight's pod-snack, Myq celebrates the first night of Chanukah with a bunch of jokes about it. Enjoy!

67: John Absurd and the AppMapper App

December 5th, 2020


On today's pod-meal, Myq big ups his friend Liz Glazer (and their weekly IG live chat show, Weird Week Wednesdays), his mother, Rini's Aunt Annette, …

66: I Am Happy For Elliot Page (All Sincerity, Plus One Silly Unrelated Poem)

December 5th, 2020


Elliot Page came out as trans this week. I am happy for him/them. I expressed it on social media, and an overwhelming majority of people I know who responded did so positively, and I wanted to share that here as well, …

65: Branching Out (Another Edition of Excalibur the Eyebrow)

December 2nd, 2020


In tonight's pod-snack, Myq shares some news and social media responses about Excalibrow. (Excalibur the Eyebrow. For short. With this extended parenthetical. For long. But not for long!)

64: Castle Grade School

December 1st, 2020


On tonight's final pod of November, Myq discusses gratitudes of the past week, doing podcasts with Sagar Bhatt, Bethany Van Delft, Micah Sherman, Brett Singer, Willie Caldwell, Ivan Anderson, and more. He recommends the …

63: The Amazing Spider-Shoe

November 28th, 2020


In today's pod-meal, Myq discusses a recent online friendly neighborhood spider-debate about shoes, boots, trucks, and cars, having nothing to do with spiders or Spider-Man. Please enjoy!

62: The Spectacular Spider-Dan(ny Hatch)

November 25th, 2020


On tonight's pod-snack, Myq sings the praises of The Comedy Studio Podcast, hosted by wonderful friend and hilarious comedian Danny Hatch, with …

61: Web of Spider-Grace

November 22nd, 2020


On today's pod-snack, Gratitude Week continues! Or kicks off! Or was here the entire time! Myq shares some fun interactions he had online about …

60: The Unadorned Spider-Pod

November 21st, 2020


On tonight's pod-meal, Myq discusses the giving of thanks, the naming of "Gratitudes," the defining of assholery, the concept of crossovers in comic …

59: Dolly Parton Joke Hydra

November 18th, 2020


On today's pod-snack, it's another edition of "Something Happened On Social Media And Myq Talks About It" or something of that nature. Myq posted a joke last night, and this morning, a social media company said that the …

58: I Declare an Armoire

November 14th, 2020


On today's pod-meal, Myq shares the resolution of the previous episode's sink saga, helps Rini address a bug in their home, and highlights meaningful …

57: November Drain

November 12th, 2020


In today's pod-snack, Myq shares about his recent/current challenges regarding the bathroom sink.

Related topics include high school nicknames, what …

56: Dream Laundry

November 11th, 2020


On today's pod-snack, Myq shares a couple fun past conversations with Rini, and also some stories about near-indestructible insects that we don't need to worry about probably but it IS unsettling.


55: A (So Much) Fun

November 8th, 2020


Happy election day week year pandemic eon billion whatsomethings!

On today's pod-meal, Myq shares some election tweets/news, tells some stories of nice things happenings online, recommends the work of Nick Vatterott and …

54: Sup, Supposers!

November 5th, 2020


On tonight's pod-snack, Myq discusses acting, actors, actions, acts, and more!

The more includes imagining and remembering. Can you even imagine? Well, listen, and then you can remember.

Remember to imagine, and/or …

53: Election Eve (Plus Weird Poetry)

November 2nd, 2020


On tonight's pre-election pod-snack, Myq discusses the weirdness of now, and also other weirdnesses and non-weirdnesses. Also, there are some limericks or haikus or both, but almost certainly not neither!

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