SwanWaters Healing Podcast

69 EpisodesProduced by Mags Thomson

Welcome to the SwanWaters Healing Podcast. Every week I will share some of my ideas, tools, and skills about abuse and healing. Sometimes it will be a short practical tool, sometimes it will be a more in-depth exploration of your healing journey.All the resources and ideas shared here and on the Swa… read more

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E71 - Compassion Grows Compassion

May 19th, 2019

7:54

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags discusses the way that we can be our own worst enemies (and that we need to be more …

E70 - From Victim To Survivor

May 12th, 2019

8:11

In this episode of The Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about making the escape from abuse. Learn how to make the transition from victim of …

E69 - The Story of Aubrey Cole and Captain Crazy

May 6th, 2019

1:28:08

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks with fellow SwanWaters team member Aubrey Cole about her experience of living in an …

E68 - Focus On Yourself

April 29th, 2019

6:05

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about how easy it is to fall into focusing all your energy on the person who abused you. While it's totally natural, it's not going to serve you in the …

E67 - Having The Feels

April 22nd, 2019

7:31

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about the way we get too hard on ourselves when we're experiencing lots of emotion during the healing journey.

Main Take-Aways:

• You can feel conflicting …

E66 - The Pendulum Swing

April 15th, 2019

8:29

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about the back and forth of emotional experiences, behaviors, and beliefs when you heal.

Main Takeaways:

• When you're healing, you can go from being lax …

E65 - Healing In Circles

April 8th, 2019

12:27

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags discusses the way that healing often requires you to go back over the same painful territory. …

E64 - The Not So Subtle Art Of Healing

March 31st, 2019

8:30

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about the fact that healing is often quite an in-your-face process. But that, given …

E63 - Time For A Break

March 10th, 2019

7:04

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about why the SwanWaters team is taking a two-week break from social media between …

E62 - Healing Is A Verb

March 3rd, 2019

5:05

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags talks about how you have to participate in your own healing or nothing's going to change. 


Main Take-Aways:


• Healing doesn't just magically happen: it's …

E61 - Quality Over Quantity

February 24th, 2019

8:47

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags asks the question, "What if, instead of rushing to do as many things as possible in our day, we slow down and do less, but with greater care and more intent."

The …

E60 - Productivity In Healing

February 17th, 2019

6:13

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags discusses the way we take the capitalist value of productivity over humanity into our healing …

E59 - How Carrie Embraced Her Inner-Swan

February 10th, 2019

41:59

In this episode, Mags interviews Carrie—the content manager and editor for SwanWaters. 

*Trigger Warning: detailed description of religious abuse and mention of self-harm

Carrie is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, …

E58 - Brainwashing You For Good

February 3rd, 2019

7:49

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags discusses the importance of getting around people who can help you recalibrate your thinking in order to heal after abuse. And also to transform the way you think …

E57 - Carrie Stages a Hostile Podcast Take-Over

January 27th, 2019

1:09:46

Inspired by The Life After Podcast episode where Chuck Parson interviewed Brady Hardin, Carrie staged a hostile takeover of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast to talk to SwanWaters director Mags Thomson about the origins of …

E56 - House of Mirrors

January 20th, 2019

29:31

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags and Carrie reflect on a piece Stewart (Mags' husband) wrote about his experience with her toxic family. 

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Main Take-Aways

  •  When you're aware that the abusive …

E55 - Setting Yourself Up For Success

January 14th, 2019

6:00

So often, as soon as we wake up our mind flood with everything that we should be doing that day. All the chores and tasks that are on our mental …

E54 - Make Your Chores Count

January 6th, 2019

12:23

When we think about self-care and healing, we often feel overwhelmed at the prospect of adding more things to our all ready overflowing to-do list. So if we can't add more to the list, how can we make the items that are …

E53 - Productivity In Healing

November 25th, 2018

8:18

In this episode of the Pint-Sized Healing Podcast, Mags explores the idea of slowing down to heal—rather than rushing because you think you think you …

E52 - Oppressive Religion & Religious Trauma Syndrome

November 19th, 2018

1:22:47

Before you get started with today's episode, I just wanted to address the fact that we are going to be talking about religion today. Religion is usually something we stay clear of because this topic is quite triggering …

E51 - Two Things Can Be True At Once

November 12th, 2018

10:40

In this episode, Mags addresses the temptation we have to exclude one truth in favor of another—as though they can't both be an honest representation of reality.

Main Take-Aways

• We can experience seemingly …

E50 - The Blissful World Where the Narcissist Is Never To Blame

November 5th, 2018

34:16

In this episode Carrie and I talk about an old blog post entitled: The Blissful World Where the Narcissist Is Never To Blame.

You can find the post …

E49 - The Best Revenge

October 29th, 2018

8:21

I saw a meme recently that gave me a bit of a giggle. It said: Not giving a fuck, is better than revenge! The more PC version of that is probably: the best revenge is no revenge.

That inspired me to talk about revenge …

E48 - The Passing of My Father

October 22nd, 2018

20:49

In this episode, I revisit a blog post I wrote two years ago about abusive parents passing away. It was inspired by my friend S who lost her toxic …

E47 - The Terrifying Euphoria

October 15th, 2018

12:19

Today I talk about the Terrifying Euphoria, a concept I reference a lot. It is something that I feel we often encounter in our healing journey.

- We sometimes identify with the trauma we have encountered in our lives
- As …

E44 - Road Trip of Narcissistic Abuse

September 24th, 2018

39:14

This week I am joined my spiritual mentor and energy healer Jacqui McGinn. We talk about the effects of narcissistic abuse and focus especially on …

E43 - The Villain Is So Good at Playing the Victim

September 17th, 2018

30:45

Carrie Maya and I read an old blog post of mine and comment on how our insights have developed over the years.

Here is the original blog post from …

E42 - Moving Through Emotions When Overwhelmed

September 3rd, 2018

9:08

SwanWaters team member Carrie Maya talks you through her process as she deals with emotional overwhelm (it's real-time!)

- Where are you feeling the emotion?
- What is the emotion you are feeling?
- What is at the root of …

E38 - You Are My Sunshine

August 31st, 2018

2:48

In this episode I share a little trick I used (and still use) to quiet those nasty voices in my head that tell me I am not good enough, not worthy of love...

After recording this episode I came across this Instagram …

E41 - Relationships with Others and Yourself

August 27th, 2018

9:20

Today's episode was originally recorded as a Facebook Live. I answer the questions left for me in the Facebook Group.

I talk about building and maintaining relationships and friendships.

- We may have learned toxic …

E40 - Mistake or Abuse

August 20th, 2018

11:10

Sometimes we say the wrong thing, we make someone feel uncomfortable, insecure or just plain bad. We don’t mean to, but we cannot always predict how others will react. We are not always 100% switched on to our own …

E39 - Welcome to the Human Race

August 13th, 2018

7:07

Have you considered that some of your responses are not part of being a survivor of abuse, but simply the result of being part of the human race?

- …

E37 - Celebrate Your Progress

July 30th, 2018

6:30

Healing is a learning curve, and it takes time and practice to get better at it.

***
We repeat what we don't repair
– Christine Langley – Obaugh
***

- STOP kicking yourself
- See and celebrate your progress
- Learning takes …

E36 - Overthinking

July 27th, 2018

7:15

We were discussing the habit of overthinking in the SwanWaters Facebook Group. I wanted to give you my perspective and share some tools on how to …

E35 - Mindfulness and Healing with Bob Brotchie; part 2

July 15th, 2018

29:06

Bob Brotchie and I have both benefited from mindfulness while overcoming the effects of childhood trauma. We share our experiences in this podcast …

E34 - Mindfulness and Healing with Bob Brotchie; part 1

July 15th, 2018

23:33

Bob Brotchie and I have both benefited from mindfulness while overcoming the effects of childhood trauma. We share our experiences in this podcast …

E33 – 3 Myths about PTSD

July 15th, 2018

5:11

PTSD is a natural response to trauma, just as bleeding is a normal response to being stabbed.

This is a vital point actually. So often we feel like we are going crazy and some people feel a sense of shame for developing …

E32 - You Are Loved; a response to the passing of Anthony Bourdain

July 15th, 2018

9:28

This is my response on the day of hearing about Anthony Bourdain's passing. It is an emotional appeal to reach out to your loved ones and let them know they are loved unconditionally.

We need to have a conversation as …

E31 - Emotional Flashbacks in PTSD

July 15th, 2018

7:03

Realizing that flashbacks could be emotional, and did not have to be disassociative in any other sense of the word, I started to better understand …

E30 – Feel the Pain

July 15th, 2018

7:19

As much as we’d like to just stop feeling the pain and the grief in our lives, we can’t just pretend it’s not there. In order to heal it, we need to feel it. And we need to talk about it. If not, it’ll come to bite us …

E29 - You Are Lovable

July 15th, 2018

5:50

In the aftermath of Mother’s Day (this podcast was originally posted on 14 May 2018), you may need a reminder that you are -in fact- entirely lovable.

- Happy healthy people do not abuse other people
- Their trauma does …

E28 – To Should List

July 15th, 2018

7:57

This episode of the pint-sized healing podcast looks at personal efficiency and how our obsession with to-do lists may cause us to feel a lot of …

E27 - Mother's Day Is Coming

July 15th, 2018

6:38

In this episode, I talk to you about Mother's Day (it was originally published on 30 April 2018) and give you some alternative ways to celebrate the day if you are a survivor of maternal abuse (or if you just want to …

E26 – Use Ceremony to Let Go

July 15th, 2018

6:28

Letting go is an important step of healing, but one we often do not mark or celebrate. Creating a ceremony when you are ready to let go of pain, is …

E25 – Harness the Power of Positive

July 15th, 2018

7:54

Let's talk about the power of positive thought. Not the frantically trying to think negative thoughts type, but actual positivity.

- Writing down positive experiences helps us remember them
- A focus on positive can help …

E24 – Dont Let Your Past Define You

July 15th, 2018

8:48

Once we get out of an abusive situation it can be difficult to remember who we are outside of that narrative. But, holding on to our past may get us …

E23 – Strategize to Influence Your Circumstances

July 15th, 2018

6:59

This is the third and final step of my strategy for communicating with people I know are toxic.

- Create the circumstances where you can use your communicative strength
- An abuser will actively pursue to keep you off …

E22 – Find Your Power

July 15th, 2018

5:29

This is the second step of three that I use when dealing with someone who is toxic.

- Find out where your strength lies
- Respond in a way that makes you feel empowered

E21 - Responding With Peace

July 15th, 2018

7:16

This is the first step of three that I use when having to deal with someone who I know is toxic.

- When we react emotionally we are more easily …

E20 - The Rules Do Not Apply

July 13th, 2018

6:09

A little while ago, I was listening to Heather Dane’s Hay House Radio show when her guest Arielle Ford—a relationship expert—shared a disclaimer that …

E19 – Self-Care and Self Compassion

July 13th, 2018

7:51

Raise your hand if you do this: when you do something to look after yourself you have a huge guilt trip? Is there part of you that things looking after yourself in selfish? Then this is the episode for you!

- You can't …

E18 – Self Care When You Do Not Feel You Can

July 13th, 2018

25:00

Today I am joined by Christine Judd. She is a holistic business mentor, author, yoga teacher and Lomi Lomi practitioner. Her journey through …

E17 – Creative Ways to Self Care

July 13th, 2018

8:47

Once you start thinking of self-care as a way to look after different aspects of your being, you open yourself up to creative ways to self-care.

- Make your bed
- Dress to impress (and start with nice undies!)
- Declutter!

E16 - What Self-Care Is and Isn’t

July 13th, 2018

5:48

People often think of self-care as bubble baths and fancy chocolates, but I think that a much too narrow definition of the concept.

- Many people see …

E15 – Toxicity Breeds Toxicity

July 13th, 2018

8:47

We see this a lot in toxic relationships. I have certainly witnessed it in the family I grew up in. With our parents constantly attacking our boundaries, my sisters and I developed a defense mechanism: a set of …

E14 – Sometimes 1 Big Boundary Is Easier

July 13th, 2018

6:39

Sometimes it is easier to just put down one big boundary rather than 100 little, individual ones. The biggest of all big boundaries is obviously No Contact, but I understand that isn’t always an option. Even on a …

E13 – You May Not Be Bad At Boundaries

July 12th, 2018

5:51

You might not feel very comfortable with doing it, but in reality, setting boundaries is about communicating what you want and don’t want. I think on average, targets (who are often empaths) tend to be fairly strong …

E12 – Boundaries Are Not Selfish

July 12th, 2018

8:38

If we were to believe abusers and toxic people, then enforcing boundaries is the most selfish act in the world; personal boundaries should be …

E11 – Compassionate Goal Setting

July 12th, 2018

7:23

This podcast was originally posted on 1 January 2018, so I do talk about New Year's Resolutions... but the good news is that compassionate goal …

E10 - It Is All In Your Head

July 11th, 2018

7:01

This episode was originally published on 25 December 2017, that's why there are a fair few Christmas references... What I am talking about though, is how we sometimes project too many thoughts and expectations on …

E9 – React or Respond, Emotional Mastery

July 11th, 2018

6:15

What if you didn't have to be a slave to your emotions? Wouldn't that be great? Well, I think that this is very much possible!

- Don't try to cover up …

E8 – Failing at Failure

July 11th, 2018

5:09

Failure is hard! In fact, I think failure may be the thing you fail at most... In this episode, I talk about failure and how it feeds into our feelings of guilt and our self-image.

- Mistakes are not failure
- Adjusted …

E7 – Loneliness and the Expectation of Company

July 11th, 2018

5:27

The episode where I mention what my first ever boyfriend taught me about loneliness. This episode was first published on 3 December 2017, and talks …

E6 – Angry Or Not Here I Come

July 11th, 2018

7:32

In this episode, I talk about anger. It is an emotion that is often pushed away and misunderstood.

- Society seems to tell us not to be angry
- Be …

E5 – Fleas and Allergies

July 10th, 2018

5:21

Last week we spoke about triggers. This week I explain how triggers can influence us in different ways.

- You may have copied some toxic behaviors
- You may experience emotional flashbacks

E4 – Embrace Your Triggers

July 10th, 2018

6:55

Today I talk about an inconvenient truth of trauma healing... you may not want to hear this, but you are going to have to!

- Triggers highlight where we still need to heal
- It is okay to be triggered and to feel raw
- We …

E3 - Personal Growth Paradox

July 10th, 2018

6:11

Have you ever wondered how you are supposed to be happy with who you are, while at the same time strive for personal growth? Yeah, so have I!

- Acceptance is important
- So is the drive to want to improve ourselves
- …

E2 - Abuse Is Not Personal but Personalized

July 10th, 2018

3:28

Different abusive strategies and weapons are used by abusers to make you feel that what is happening to you is personal. It is not! It is however personalized.
- Abuse is adjusted to impact you as much as possible
- Abuse …

E1 - Abuse is About Power

July 10th, 2018

6:41

No matter the setting or weapon of choice, abuse is always about power. In this episode I discuss:
- What is at the root of abuse
- Different abusive tactics
- Different abusive relationships

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