Oz 9

23 EpisodesProduced by Shannon Perry

Spring 2142 and Gated Galaxies has launched its 400 Oz-8000 ships, each carrying 50,000 "resting guests" to, hopefully, a new home on a shiny, brand-new planet. As soon as they find one. IF they find one. This is the story of one of those ships – the Oz 9 – and its tiny crew of hopeless incompetents… read more

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episode twenty: In space, no one can hear you stupid

July 14th, 2019


Somewhere aboard the Oz 9, a bomb is ticking. Actually, a crap-ton of things are going wrong aboard the Oz 9; this is just the biggest and most likely to kill our crew the soonest.

It's the final episode of Season 1, …

episode 19: Peeing in a bucket and eating pocket lint

June 30th, 2019


If you've ever been in mortal peril, you know the most crucial decision you'll make in that situation is your choice of writing implement. 

No? Well, that makes you smarter than this crowd, but before your head swells …

episode eighteen: I speak a little oregano

June 16th, 2019


You know that one colleague at work who is just hopeless? Tries earnestly to do the job, help out, and be useful, but usually ends up spilling his …

episode seventeen and a half: Between the wormhole and the Rinse McGoo

June 9th, 2019


It's that kind of day, innit? One minute, you're out having a quick ciggie next to the tip, and then the world goes all wobbly, and suddenly you're aboard someone else's spaceship, only it's held together with duct tape …

episode seventeen: So the deed could not be done

June 2nd, 2019


The episode that finally answers the critical question: why do robots climb like cows?

There's an arm under the sofa, Jessie's dangling from a shelf in Maintenance Bay 15, and we learn what ligatures are for.

It's, …

episode sixteen: We are not breathing the passengers

May 19th, 2019


'Allo, little piggies! 

The notorious assassin le Bichon Frise is circling our crew like a vulture who hopes his prey drops soon because he's tired …

episode fifteen: Heroic Running!

May 5th, 2019


Here's a shocker: the Oz 9 crew's lives are in danger. Suffocation, toxic gas, a loose assassin, the risk of being crushed under their own denseness–perils lurk around every corner and certainly between slices of bread.

episode fourteen and a half

April 28th, 2019


It's late, and there's an assassin loose aboard the Oz 9, but Leet isn't going to let that interrupt his conversation with sleeping people. 

After all, in at least a dozen conversations, only one of them called him …

episode fourteen: Of baguettes and bastards

April 21st, 2019


Captain Jessie is now aboard the Oz 9, which is great, except she brought her assassin with her (pro tip: don't do that), and he's managed to get a …

episode thirteen: Aim for the mime

April 7th, 2019


You know how the little fluffy dogs are always the meanest? Well, this bichon frise is no exception. He's coming for Captain Jessie, and things are looking bad for the fearless, tartan-clad leader of the 6748. 

Join our …

Oz 9 Mini Episode 10 and a half

March 31st, 2019


What happens when a homicidal, two-headed robot gets shoved into an empty (empty??) storage bay without arms or hope of release?

Good question. Listen in and find out. 

This special mini-episode slots in between …

episode twelve: A bucket full of mime

March 24th, 2019


A pod has popped open, and something is roaming loose aboard the Oz 9. Something silent.... but ... deadly?

Jessie, Captain of the neighboring Oz 6748, may have good reason to fear for her life, 


Olivia explains the …

episode eleven: She might do some lasting pickles

March 10th, 2019

It's Day Two

And we're as startled as you are that anyone's still alive.

Day two on the Oz 9 sees the crew celebrating fewer fatalities (sorry, Matt) at least on board (sorry, Sweden) and making a critical discovery …

episode ten: Fixing the ejaculax

February 24th, 2019


Will Madeline and Joe be able to fix the copulatron and attach it to the forniculator before they realize neither of these things
actually exists?

Is …

episode nine: Mind the gap

February 11th, 2019

In which:

Colin makes a sausage-scented discovery, Rock and Donna talk murder, we learn about automatic chopsticks, and Olivia confesses that she …

episode eight: Things that go stupid in the night

January 30th, 2019

In which

It's "night" on the Oz 9, and the crew is literally and figuratively stumbling around in the dark. Back on earth a cub reporter and a private dick are hot on Mr. Southers' heels, asking the sorts of questions …

episode seven: The biggest bunch of mindless wankers

January 13th, 2019

In which

Leet is accosted by someone (or thing) and bunged into airlock 7,

Olivia gets tetchy about Leet's imminent demise,

There's an enormous …

episode six: Dark and starting to collect liquid

January 7th, 2019

In which

Leet reveals a certain fascination with some heavenly orbs...

More pods go squelchy...

We discover how the crews of the Oz fleet were assembled, and ...

The narrator reveals a Very Big Secret.

You're listening …

episode five: There's a zombie in the corridor

December 23rd, 2018


Heave a sigh of relief: Leet’s symmetry has been restored. Might suggest you breathe through your mouth, though, as there’s a rapidly decomposing dead person in the corridor. Messing up Joe’s clean floors. Seriously, …

episode four: Space is great for sulking

December 13th, 2018


Episode four in which Olivia gasses the crew, Leet's symmetry is imperiled, and the janitor and the AI debate the relative value of the tooth fairy.


Richard Cowen as Leet
Bonnie Brantley as Jessie
Tim Sherburn …

episode three: Great heaving chesticles

December 4th, 2018


Have you ever thrown the last of your milkshake out the car window, only to have it splat on the windshield of the car behind you? OK, imagine doing that with liquified human remains, in space, where there are no …

episode two: I had a cake all to meself

November 24th, 2018


Still smoking from the launch pad, our band of space explorers can't quite get a grip on this whole "survival" idea. So I wouldn't get too attached …

episode one: What the f&#* is that smell??

November 18th, 2018


On an otherwise unexceptional Tuesday in 2042, Gated Galaxies fired off 400 of its Oz 8000™ ships, each with 50,000 “resting guests” tucked into stasis pods, plus a skeleton crew of up to half-a-dozen total no-hopers.

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