Oz 9

18 Episodes

Spring 2142 and Gated Galaxies has launched its 400 Oz-8000 ships, each carrying 50,000 "resting guests" to, hopefully, a new home on a shiny, brand-new planet. As soon as they find one. IF they find one. This is the story of one of those ships – the Oz 9 – and its tiny crew of hopeless incompetents… read more

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episode one: What the f&#* is that smell??

November 18th, 2018

17:16

On an otherwise unexceptional Tuesday in 2042, Gated Galaxies fired off 400 of its Oz 8000™ ships, each with 50,000 “resting guests” tucked into stasis pods, plus a skeleton crew of up to half-a-dozen total no-hopers.

episode two: I had a cake all to meself

November 24th, 2018

12:44

Still smoking from the launch pad, our band of space explorers can't quite get a grip on this whole "survival" idea. So I wouldn't get too attached …

episode three: Great heaving chesticles

December 4th, 2018

13:41

Have you ever thrown the last of your milkshake out the car window, only to have it splat on the windshield of the car behind you? OK, imagine doing that with liquified human remains, in space, where there are no …

episode four: Space is great for sulking

December 13th, 2018

10:58

Episode four in which Olivia gasses the crew, Leet's symmetry is imperiled, and the janitor and the AI debate the relative value of the tooth fairy.

Starring

Richard Cowen as Leet Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Tim Sherburn …

episode five: There's a zombie in the corridor

December 23rd, 2018

13:41

Heave a sigh of relief: Leet’s symmetry has been restored. Might suggest you breathe through your mouth, though, as there’s a rapidly decomposing dead person in the corridor. Messing up Joe’s clean floors. Seriously, …

episode six: Dark and starting to collect liquid

January 7th, 2019

12:57
In which

Leet reveals a certain fascination with some heavenly orbs...

More pods go squelchy...

We discover how the crews of the Oz fleet were assembled, and ...

The narrator reveals a Very Big Secret.

You're listening …

episode seven: The biggest bunch of mindless wankers

January 13th, 2019

15:37
In which

Leet is accosted by someone (or thing) and bunged into airlock 7,

Olivia gets tetchy about Leet's imminent demise,

There's an enormous …

episode eight: Things that go stupid in the night

January 30th, 2019

15:55
In which

It's "night" on the Oz 9, and the crew is literally and figuratively stumbling around in the dark. Back on earth a cub reporter and a private dick are hot on Mr. Southers' heels, asking the sorts of questions …

episode nine: Mind the gap

February 11th, 2019

14:16
In which:

Colin makes a sausage-scented discovery, Rock and Donna talk murder, we learn about automatic chopsticks, and Olivia confesses that she …

episode ten: Fixing the ejaculax

February 24th, 2019

15:44

Will Madeline and Joe be able to fix the copulatron and attach it to the forniculator before they realize neither of these things actually exists?

Is …

episode eleven: She might do some lasting pickles

March 10th, 2019

15:59
It's Day Two

And we're as startled as you are that anyone's still alive.

Day two on the Oz 9 sees the crew celebrating fewer fatalities (sorry, Matt) at least on board (sorry, Sweden) and making a critical discovery …

episode twelve: A bucket full of mime

March 24th, 2019

17:30

A pod has popped open, and something is roaming loose aboard the Oz 9. Something silent.... but ... deadly?

Jessie, Captain of the neighboring Oz 6748, may have good reason to fear for her life, 

AND

Olivia explains the …

Oz 9 Mini Episode 10 and a half

March 31st, 2019

6:34

What happens when a homicidal, two-headed robot gets shoved into an empty (empty??) storage bay without arms or hope of release?

Good question. Listen in and find out. 

This special mini-episode slots in between …

episode thirteen: Aim for the mime

April 7th, 2019

17:55

You know how the little fluffy dogs are always the meanest? Well, this bichon frise is no exception. He's coming for Captain Jessie, and things are looking bad for the fearless, tartan-clad leader of the 6748. 

Join our …

episode fourteen: Of baguettes and bastards

April 21st, 2019

19:07

Captain Jessie is now aboard the Oz 9, which is great, except she brought her assassin with her (pro tip: don't do that), and he's managed to get a …

episode fourteen and a half

April 28th, 2019

10:14

It's late, and there's an assassin loose aboard the Oz 9, but Leet isn't going to let that interrupt his conversation with sleeping people. 

After all, in at least a dozen conversations, only one of them called him …

episode fifteen: Heroic Running!

May 5th, 2019

22:40

Here's a shocker: the Oz 9 crew's lives are in danger. Suffocation, toxic gas, a loose assassin, the risk of being crushed under their own denseness–perils lurk around every corner and certainly between slices of bread.

episode sixteen: We are not breathing the passengers

May 19th, 2019

18:50

'Allo, little piggies! 

The notorious assassin le Bichon Frise is circling our crew like a vulture who hopes his prey drops soon because he's tired …

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