Cover art for podcast Not By Accident

Not By Accident

36 EpisodesProduced by Sophie HarperWebsite

I became a single mother by choice, not by accident. I’ve been recording our lives for seven years to tell this story, about making choices and taking action to live the life you want. If you’re a parent, want to be a parent, or just love good storytelling, this podcast is for you.


Ep 26: Equality

It’s September 2017. I’ve been feeling recently that it’s important for you understand more of who I am. You see me as a mother, a daughter, an aunt, a friend, a podcaster, a writer. But I’m also a lesbian. You’ve always known, I’ve always told you that if I fall in love one day it will be with a woman. That you won’t ever have a Dad, but maybe one day, if things work out that way, you’ll have two mums. But it’s been abstract for you until now. You’ve only ever had a single mother. I haven't been on a date in your lifetime. It’s become abstract for me too. I miss that part of my identity sometimes, being involved in that community, but I’ve been so caught up with motherhood and work and establishing life in our new home that I’ve put it aside. For later.

But maybe later is now. The decade long fight for marriage equality in Australia has finally come to a head. The government, hampered by their own factions, has decided to ask the people once and for all: “Should the law be changed to allow same-sex couples to marry? Yes/No.” A one question postal survey, for all voting age Australians. Just tick a box and send it back. There’s no putting it aside now.

This production is made by me, Sophie Harper, in partnership with Wondery. I’m supported by generous listeners and by my family, my friends and my daughter.

Music from - CC NC License:

Passages by Kai Engel and Sunsets and Shitty Cars by Ian Sutherland.

Incidental music by Chic, Sister Sledge, John Paul Young and Bette Midler. Clips from 7.30 and Insiders, ABC TV Australia. (invoking Fair Use)

Ad music from - CC Commercial License:

Drop of Water in the Ocean by Broke For Free.



RXBar Kids: Go to & enter code accident at checkout for 25% off your first order

Hello Fresh: For $30 off your first week of HelloFresh, visit and enter code ACCIDENT30


Thank you kind people supporting me on Patreon! Margaret P. Jones, Ellie McHale, Russell Kerrison, Julie Greenhalgh, Rebecca Reid, Kasey Tomkins, Dianne Firth, Anne Staude, Sarah E. Leslie, Adam Coulson, Melanie Ann, Lea Durie, Laura Getson, Bill, Sue Giugni, Maia Bittner, Elizabeth Adcock, Laura Cherry, Bethany White, Paul S Mitchell and Mariele Thadani and more.

If you’d like to chip in a couple of dollars towards each new episode, go to


Go to to find out more about the series, join the e-newsletter or to get in touch.


We’ll be back with the next instalment in 4 weeks.

From our family to yours, Happy New Year!

Educational emoji reaction


Interesting emoji reaction


Funny emoji reaction


Agree emoji reaction


Love emoji reaction


Wow emoji reaction


Are you the creator of this podcast?

Verify your account

and pick the featured episodes for your show.

Listen to Not By Accident


A free podcast app for iPhone and Android

  • User-created playlists and collections
  • Download episodes while on WiFi to listen without using mobile data
  • Stream podcast episodes without waiting for a download
  • Queue episodes to create a personal continuous playlist
RadioPublic on iOS and Android
Or by RSS
RSS feed

Connect with listeners

Podcasters use the RadioPublic listener relationship platform to build lasting connections with fans

Yes, let's begin connecting
Browser window

Find new listeners

  • A dedicated website for your podcast
  • Web embed players designed to convert visitors to listeners in the RadioPublic apps for iPhone and Android
Clicking mouse cursor

Understand your audience

  • Capture listener activity with affinity scores
  • Measure your promotional campaigns and integrate with Google and Facebook analytics
Graph of increasing value

Engage your fanbase

  • Deliver timely Calls To Action, including email acquistion for your mailing list
  • Share exactly the right moment in an episode via text, email, and social media
Icon of cellphone with money

Make money

  • Tip and transfer funds directly to podcastsers
  • Earn money for qualified plays in the RadioPublic apps with Paid Listens