Cover art for podcast Losing a Child: Always Andy's Mom

Losing a Child: Always Andy's Mom

207 EpisodesProduced by Marcy Larson, MDWebsite

When pediatrician mom of three, Marcy Larson's 14 yo son, Andy, was killed in a car accident in 2018, she felt like her life was over. In many ways, that life was over, and a new one forced to begin in its place. Come alongside her as she works through this journey of healing. She discusses grief an… read more

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Episode 209: Shrinidhi's Mom

September 14th, 2023


Silence is deafening. Freedom is imprisonment. These are the first words that today's guest, Suma, wrote in her journal after her 18-year-old …

Episode 208: Vincent's Dad

September 7th, 2023


When I see a cardinal flying around me, I believe it is a little 'sign' of Andy. I have many stories of cardinals, including two recent ones that came just when I needed them. Friends of mine who are bereaved parents …

Episode 207: Cadence's Mom

August 31st, 2023


Ally's life changed in the blink of an eye just 6 months ago when her 20-year-old daughter and best friend, Cadence, was killed in a tragic car …

Episode 206: Maksymilian's Mom

August 24th, 2023


Today's guest, Aga, compares her life of grief to living in a deep, dark forest. She says that she longs to see light. Occasionally, bits of light do find their way down through all of the darkness, but then, in an …

Episode 205: Five Years Later

August 17th, 2023


Five years later. There aren't words to describe the heaviness of this day. I got an email from my father-in-law saying that he felt like their lives …

Episode 204:Ashley's Mom

August 10th, 2023


Every week before I release a new podcast episode, I listen to the full episode one last time in order to get one or two take-home points that I can …

Episode 203: Corban's Dad

August 3rd, 2023


"I'm gonna leave." This is such an innocent phrase. It is something that Chester's son, Corban, likely said to his parents hundreds of times over his …

Episode 202: Delia Grace's Mom

July 27th, 2023


When someone asked Elizabeth what her grief felt like in the months after her 9-week-old baby, Delia Grace died, she described it as if her body was …

Episode 201: Aaron's Mom

July 20th, 2023


I first met today's guest, Destia, when I was a guest speaker for Lisa Boehm's Hope and Healing Together Community last year. I learned that Destia's son had died of Moyamoya disease, and that, in her grief, Destia was …

Episode 200: Recapping 200 Episodes: Creating a Community

July 13th, 2023


When starting this podcast almost 4 years ago now, I had a goal. I wanted to create a resource for bereaved parents, a platform for parents to tell stories of their children and their personal grief journeys. I wanted …

Episode 199: Andy's Mom

July 6th, 2023


Andy's Mom. These are such sweet words for me to hear. When today's guest, Mary, wrote me a few weeks ago, and she introduced herself as Andy's Mom, we had an instant connection. She was not Andrew's Mom or Drew's Mom; …

Episode 198: Officer Katie's Mom

June 29th, 2023


I love how timing so often works out perfectly. Tracy should have been on the podcast months ago, but due to computer issues, this episode comes out …

Episode 197: Unhealthy vs. Healthy Coping

June 22nd, 2023


After the death of a child, grieving parents continue to function. We get up out of bed (most days). We usually shower. We eat at least something. Some of us even try to work. How do we do it? We cope and each person …

Episode 196: Adam T's Mom

June 15th, 2023


This week's episode was an emotional one for me as will be quite obvious to anyone listening. As I was listening one last time before releasing it, I think I realized why this week's guest impacted me so intensely. I …

Episode 195: Becca's Mom

June 8th, 2023


Each week, I usually find one main takeaway point from the podcast episode. After talking with Chris though, I learned two key things. As much as I …

Episode 194: Ryan's Parents

June 1st, 2023


After Greg and Cathy's adult son died unexpectedly by suicide, every part of their lives was impacted by the grief. Day-to-day tasks seemed almost …

Episode 193: Patricia's Daughter - A Grieving Teen

May 25th, 2023


One of the most commonly asked questions that I get from listeners is, 'How do I help my surviving children in their grief?' and even more specifically, 'How do I help my grieving teen?' When I was contacted by Olivia's …

Episode 192: Resilience in Grief

May 18th, 2023


Resilience is a word that we don't often think about before encountering tragedy. When we see people face difficult trials and then go on to triumph, …

Episode 191: Baby Jessica's Mom

May 11th, 2023


Since starting the podcast, I have often discussed how the mind and body are closely intertwined and how during our grief, one affects the other. Grief doesn't just make us sad. It impacts every aspect of our lives …

Episode 190: Lee's Dad

May 4th, 2023


When listening to today's episode, you will likely not believe the number of times the word 'hope' is spoken. From the very first day that Jimmy's …

Episode 189: Andrew's Mom

April 27th, 2023


When listening to the story of Donna's son, Andrew, I was immediately struck with how his life was touched by God. That is not to say Andrew didn't …

Episode 188: Ask Me Anything

April 20th, 2023


Today's episode is the long-awaited Ask Me Anything episode. Virtually all of the submitted questions were for my husband. Perhaps this should not be …

Episode 187: Elizabeth's Mom

April 13th, 2023


When 13-month-old, Elizabeth was diagnosed with cancer, her parents immediately turned to traditional medicine as most parents do. She had a very …

Episode 186: Erin's Mom

April 6th, 2023


Today’s guest, Elizabeth, has learned much in the years since her 8-year-old daughter, Erin, was killed while on a hike in the mountains near …

Episode 185: Noah's Mom

March 30th, 2023


After talking with hundreds of bereaved parents over the past four years, we all seem to hold one fear in common. We are all scared, no matter how …

Episode 184: Physical Symptoms of Grief

March 23rd, 2023


Thinking back to the first hour after Andy died, I remember being in the emergency room and having such tremendous chest pain that I thought I must be having a heart attack. The ER staff actually put me through the CT …

Episode 183: Lach's Mon

March 16th, 2023


A Thousand Pounds. That's what today's guest, Bri, decided to name the book that she wrote 14 years after suddenly losing her 10 1/2-month-old son, …

Episode 182: Jacob's Mom & Dad

March 9th, 2023


Today's guests Myron and Jenny would probably say that they had a pretty blessed life before August 2015. They had both grown up in the church. They …

Episode 181: Ty's Mom

March 2nd, 2023


Today’s guest, Krysten’s oldest son, Ty, loved being in nature. Having recently graduated from high school in California, he had planned to go out to …

Episode 180: Joseph's Mom

February 23rd, 2023


When Elizabeth found out she was pregnant with twins, she was overjoyed. Then Elizabeth and her husband learned one of their babies had significant …

Episode 179: Libby's Mom

February 16th, 2023


If Brooke was asked to describe her daughter, Libby, in one word, she selected ‘Joy’. Even as a baby, she was always happy. Her favorite phrase was, ‘This is the best day ever!’ The most amazing thing about Libby, …

Episode 178: Nick's Mom

February 9th, 2023


When I first heard from a listener about today’s guest, Patti, the email included an attachment which was a copy of the obituary that Patti wrote for her late son, Nick after he took his life almost three years ago. To …

Episode 177: Groundhog Day

February 2nd, 2023


When I noticed that a podcast release day fell on Groundhog Day and it would be on a day when I would be recording with Gwen, I knew what the topic …

Episode 176: Xavier & Aidan's Mom

January 26th, 2023


Shortly after Michelle and I finished recording today’s interview, Michelle wrote back to me saying that she didn’t feel like she shared much hope. She had wanted to be inspirational to other bereaved parents when …

Episode 175: Abbie's Mum

January 19th, 2023


Imagine for just a second back to being a 14-year-old. You are likely transitioning to high school, worrying about puberty, and probably a little …

Episode 174: Rachel's Sister

January 12th, 2023


Siblings share a special bond. Oftentimes older siblings can’t remember a time without their younger brother or sister, and younger siblings have …

Episode 173: Kaitlyn's Dad

January 5th, 2023


When I think of retirement, I often think of people moving to Florida or perhaps helping out by spending extra time caring for grandchildren. However, that is not how today’s guest, Jim, spends his retirement. When Jim …

Episode 172: Madyson's Mom

December 29th, 2022


It has been less than 5 months since Brittany’s sweet 12-year-old daughter, Madyson, died unexpectedly from myocarditis, but Brittany has already …

Episode 171: Taking a Pause at Christmas

December 22nd, 2022


When Gwen and I were deciding what to name this week’s episode, Gwen’s title was ’Taking a Pause Before the Claus comes to Town: Last minute tips to …

Episode 170: Garett's Mom

December 15th, 2022


Today’s guest, Arava, reminded me of something that I think all of us know instinctually. Each person’s life is really made up of a collection of …

Episode 169: Micah's Dad

December 8th, 2022


Faith and grief are often hard for many people to feel at the same time, especially when people are from a Christian background. Christians grow up learning that God has a plan for the world and that God’s Plan is …

Episode 168: Katie's Mom

December 1st, 2022


Meeting today’s guest, Lisa, for the first time on Zoom felt like meeting an old friend. When I was thinking about what to write for this episode, …

Episode 167: For That I Am Thankful

November 24th, 2022


I have often heard people being encouraged to be ‘thankful givers.’ It is supposed to inspire us to either give with a thankful heart or be thankful …

Episode 166: Alex's Mom

November 17th, 2022


Our kids should be here. It is simply wrong that they are gone before us. It just is. Nothing that we do or say can make sense of the senseless …

Episode 165: Chloe's Mom

November 10th, 2022


Today’s guest, Melo, knows that her life changed in a moment 11 years ago when her infant daughter, Chloe, died. With that death, her life was split in two - the time before Chloe and her new life ‘After Chloe’. After …

Episode 164: Savannah's Mom

November 3rd, 2022


Those of you who follow me on Instagram and Facebook know that I have been posting video clips of my interviews over the past several months. I …

Episode 163: Paige's Mom

October 27th, 2022


When I was in the deepest, darkest pit of grief, it was almost impossible for me to think about taking care of myself physically. If you are struggling in this area, today’s guest is perfect for you to hear. She is …

Episode 162: Parker's Mom

October 20th, 2022


During the COVID-19 pandemic, we all heard it said that everyone was grieving something. Millions of people worldwide lost loved ones to disease certainly, but many talked about grieving the loss of jobs, vacations, …

Episode 161: Messy Faith & Grief

October 13th, 2022


For a minute, I want you to picture that we are traveling along our grief journey on a large tricycle with three equal-sized wheels. These three wheels represent our emotional self, our physical self, and our spiritual …

Episode 160: Josh's Mum

October 6th, 2022


When today’s guest, Jane, reminded me of the great children’s story, ‘We’re Going on a Bear Hunt’ by Michael Rosen, it made me smile. It is a …

Episode 159: Sam's Mum

September 29th, 2022


Jenny’s son, Sam, was a kid who lived in the moment. He loved life, and he enjoyed every second of it. Even as he was dying from a brain tumor, Sam continued to love life and live big. As others approached the family …

Episode 158 - Adam L's Mom

September 22nd, 2022


Four years into my grief journey, I continue to witness how people grieve in vastly different ways. As grieving parents, you might think the grief …

Episode 157: Taylor's Mom

September 15th, 2022


As I listened to this week’s episode, one word kept coming into my mind. Compassion. I initially thought of this word as it is a great way to …

Episode 156: Chris W's Mom

September 8th, 2022


When Kellie sent an audition tape to be on Ellen DeGeneres’ Game of Games in 2018, she was a teacher, making the tape with her students hoping to be be selected to be on this fun game show. She had an abundance of …

Episode 155: Men & Grief

September 1st, 2022


Without a doubt, the most common questions that I am asked by bereaved mothers concern understanding the men in their lives. Whether it is a husband, an ex-husband, or even teenage sons, women can have trouble …

Episode 154: Angelo's Mom

August 25th, 2022


I feel like I have so much in common with today’s guest, Sheila. Perhaps that is why even though I have never met Sheila in person and only talked with her remotely, I consider her a good friend now. Throughout Sheila’s …

Episode 153: Grief Refuge App

August 18th, 2022


Technology has changed how we look at the world in so many ways. Information is available with the click on your phone or computer at any time of the …

Episode 152: Erick's Mom

August 11th, 2022


My favorite quote from today’s guest, Ninette, is perhaps the best line ever uttered on the podcast. When describing grief, Ninette said, “It’s a long journey, you know. Bring some snacks.” Truer words have never been …

Episode 151: Jackson's Mom

August 4th, 2022


After Andy died, many well meaning people had all sorts of ideas of things that we could do in his memory. People encouraged me to go to our state …

Episode 150: Dani's Mom & Step-Dad

July 28th, 2022


You can't judge what is going on the inside by what you see of the outside. From the outside, Dani looked like she had it all. She lived in a great …

Episode 149: Self-Care and Grief

July 21st, 2022


I have recently been feeling sort of drained emotionally. I want to keep giving to others and helping other people, but there are days when the well seems a little dry. I worry that I won't have the capacity to do …

Episode 148: William, Emire & Elon's Mom

July 14th, 2022


‘Everything happens for a reason, life goes on.’ Please know that bereaved parents have not lost their ability to think or to be logical. We know life goes on; we just don’t know how. Yes, everything does happen for a …

Episode 147: Kian's Mom

July 7th, 2022


I love how interconnected things can become and how our huge world can suddenly feel really small. Two weeks ago now, I interviewed Cassie, Ella’s mom. You may remember that Ella died from an extremely rare tumor. …

Episode 146: Gina's Sister

June 30th, 2022


Experiencing the death of a close loved one changes people. I became a changed person after mom mom died of cancer when I was in college. I changed …

Episode 145: Ella's Mom

June 23rd, 2022


A few years ago now, Cassie’s daughter, Ella, wrote a piece on the meaning of beauty. In the final sentence of the piece, Ella wrote, “The only thing that means anything at all is excruciating beauty if only you can …

Episode 144: Jackson's Mom & Dad

June 16th, 2022


As a self-proclaimed data and analytics guy, Ben discovered a disturbing fact shortly after his infant son, Jackson, died. He learned that nearly 50,000 children between the ages of 0 and 20 die each year in the United …

Episode 143: Everly's Mom & Dad

June 9th, 2022


When Nick and Martha’s young daughter, Everly, was brought to the emergency room from daycare, they were told, “Your daughter is very sick.” Martha …

Episode 142: Caring for Grievers

June 2nd, 2022


I have to admit that before I lost Andy and started this podcast, I did not think much about the importance of caring for grieving people. You might …

Episode 141: Poppy's Mom

May 26th, 2022


“I’m sorry, Katie, but I can’t find a heartbeat.” These are the words that changed Katie’s life forever. After an easy pregnancy, today’s guest went …

Episode 140: Braedon's Mom

May 19th, 2022



When I was about halfway through today’s interview with Braeden’s Mom, Tiffany, the word that came to my mind was ‘empowered.’ I remember thinking to myself, this is an unusual word to describe a bereaved …

Episode 139: Brendan's Mom

May 12th, 2022


Sometimes, it feels like the world is really big and at other times, it feels really small. When I first spoke with today’s guest, Jen, the world actually felt quite tiny. She is from my home state of Iowa and lives in …

Episode 138: Ella's Mom & Dad

May 5th, 2022


From early in Betty and Kyle's relationship, they had a basic plan for their life together. For years, that plan worked without a hitch. They got …

Episode 137: Matty's Mom

April 28th, 2022


Today's guest, Rachel, has had a long relationship with grief starting in her teens when her dad died in a car accident. Over the years, she was there for the deaths of several other loved ones. She had even witnessed …

Episode 136: Andy's 18th Birthday

April 21st, 2022


When I realized that Andy's 18th birthday was going to fall on a Thursday, and thus be a podcast release day, I knew that the episode would have to …

Episode 135: Zoey's Mom

April 14th, 2022


When Monica's daughter, Zoey, suddenly died on her 5th birthday on a trip to Disney World, she did not know how she could go on. How could she …

Episode 134: Dakota's Mom

April 7th, 2022


In the days after Andy died, someone from my office quickly arranged for each member of our family to start seeing a counselor. Eric and I were given an appointment together and it was, in a word, weird. We sat there on …

Episode 133: Where Is God in My Grief?

March 31st, 2022


When applying to medical school, potential students are required to write a personal statement to accompany the application. I remember specifically …

Episode 132: Jessica's Mom

March 24th, 2022


Tenacious. When listening to today's guest, Nancy, talk about her precious daughter, Jessica, the word that immediately comes to my mind is tenacious. No matter what life threw her way, Jessica continued to fight and …

Episode 131: Judson's Mom

March 17th, 2022

When I started the Always Andy's Mom podcast, the story was picked up by local TV stations. I remember one particular interview on my family room …

Episode 130: Aven's Mom

March 10th, 2022


A few month's after the death of Debra's 6 year old son, Aven, she had a friend point out something that she had never noticed before. Her friend …

Episode 129: Hudson's Mom

March 3rd, 2022

Sometimes when you meet someone, you just click and a friendship forms immediately. I had that sudden feeling of friendship from the first email that I received from today's guest, Amanda. I don't want to give away too …

Episode 128: Krissy's Mom

February 23rd, 2022

Shortly after recording today's episode, I received an email from today's guest, Shirlene. I want to share part of that email with all of you - 'I …

Episode 127: Grieving as a Couple

February 17th, 2022


I have a distinct memory of a promise made on the night that Andy died when our broken, little family stayed together in Peter's hospital room. Eric …

Episode 125: Rachel & Hunter's Moms

February 3rd, 2022


When I started thinking about what to write about for today’s guests, Traci and Michelle, a song immediately came into my head. Perhaps it is because …

Episode 124: Ray's Mom

January 27th, 2022


Shortly after her son Ray died in 2001, Darla's neighbor, Kay, walked up to Darla's front step. Kay told Darla that she recognized Darla's pain …

Episode 123: Dan's Mum

January 20th, 2022


Today's guest, Karen, says that in today's society, we all suffer from a lack of 'loss intelligence'. We are taught so many things in our lives, both intellectually and emotionally. We are taught how to love others and …

Episode 122: Liel's Dad

January 13th, 2022


I have a confession to make. I have been lying to you all for almost two and a half years now. In my defense, I did not know that I was lying so I …

Episode 121: Max's Dad

January 6th, 2022


Courageous. Brave. Strong. These are words that people often use to describe those of us who are bereaved parents. 'You're so strong! I could never …

Episode 120: Post-Christmas Chat

December 30th, 2021


Support from other grieving people can play such an integral role in our grief journeys. Being able to talk with people who 'get it' can bring us …

Episode 119: Godwinks with Gwen

December 23rd, 2021


What do yellow irises, a winter planter and a $10 bill have in common? They are all parts of amazing stories in today's podcast. The holidays are an …

Episode 118: Brogan's Mom

December 16th, 2021


When today's guest, Dana, lost her son Brogan in a freak accident at the young age of 10, people watching her from the outside might have thought …

Episode 117: Loving Life After Loss

December 9th, 2021


On the day that Marie's husband, Rob, died suddenly of a brain aneurysm, Marie's young son asked her a question through his tears, "Who will take care of us now?" Marie's answer was quick and definite. "I will. I will …

Episode 116: Emilia's Mama & Dada

December 2nd, 2021


From the first moments after baby Emilia was born, things did not go according to plan. The birth plan that was so carefully written, went completely …

Episode 115: Jacob's Sister

November 25th, 2021


"Grief is not an emotion; it is an experience." These are wise words from today's guest, words that I want to spread far and wide to anyone who will listen. Grief is not a feeling like happiness, sadness, anger or …

Episode 114: Grieving Through the Holidays

November 18th, 2021


It is heard both in song and in general conversation that this is 'the most wonderful time of the year.' For those of us who are grieving, however, …

Episode 113: Stevie's Mom

November 11th, 2021


Eight months ago, today's guest, Erin, got an unthinkable call while she and her husband had gone away for a weekend getaway - their previously …

Episode 112: Alexis's Mom

November 4th, 2021


I can honestly say that I enjoy talking to every single guest I have on the podcast. Every story is unique and special, and I always learn something, whether big or small. Many of my guests are inspiring and make me …

Episode 111: Davids's Mom

October 28th, 2021


When Liene's only child, Davids was killed at the age of 7, she didn't know how she and her husband would survive. Davids was their only child - …

Episode 110: Luc's Mom

October 21st, 2021


Like many young boys, Luc loved sports. He loved playing soccer and baseball and like every good Canadian boy, Luc loved hockey. His mom, Lianne, says that she thinks what he really loved was being part of a team. He …

Episode 109: Aviva's Dad

October 14th, 2021


Today's guest, Hans, says he 'prides himself on being a father first and foremost, cherishing every moment of his fatherhood journey.' Before bed each night, his children beg for their dad to make up another silly story …

Episode 108: David's Mom

October 7th, 2021


Parenting can never be described as easy, but parenting when your family is suffering after the death of a child is beyond difficult. Grief is …

Episode 107: Corey's Mom

September 30th, 2021


Nine years ago, when 6 week-old Corey was admitted to the hospital for generalized weakness, everyone assumed that he had some sort of infection. His …

Episode 106: Support: Who Do I Feel Better Around?

September 23rd, 2021


When someone asks you how you are doing, what is your response? I know that for most people, even bereaved people, the quick answer is, "Fine." (I learned today a great acronym for FINE - Feelings I'm Not Expressing.) …

Episode 105: Garret's Mom & Sister

September 16th, 2021


We have spoken many times over the past two years about the fact that there is no 'right way' to grieve and that different people grieve in very different ways, even if they are grieving the same person in the same …

Episode 104: Martin's Mom

September 9th, 2021


Live in the moment.

When Joni's son, Martin, was dying from cancer at the age of 18, the family asked him if he had any words of advice for his newborn baby sister. His answer, "Live in the moment." Those four simple …

Episode 103: Emmy's Mom

September 2nd, 2021


Emmy's Mom, Erin, knew her daughter was going to be a special girl from the moment she was born. Emily (known by her family as Emmy) was born on 8/03/03 at 3:08pm weighing 8 lbs 3oz in labor room 308. She quickly became …

Episode 102: Luke's Mom

August 26th, 2021


Today's guest, Laura, loves sharing the story of her son, Luke, and his amazing teen faith in God. Throughout all of his struggles with cancer, he never lost that faith. Luke always lived with an eternal perspective. He …

Episode 101: Nico's Mom & Wife; Juju's Grandma & Mom

August 19th, 2021


This episode of the Always Andy's Mom podcast focuses on relationships and loss. Today, I have the privilege to speak with two guests mourning the loss of two special people in their lives. Just over one year ago, …

Episode 100: Livestream with Marcy & Eric

August 12th, 2021


Two years ago, when I started the Always Andy's Mom podcast, I never could have imagined getting to episode 100. I remember Eric saving the first …

Episode 99: Miles' Mom

August 5th, 2021


Unlike all of my previous guests, when Miles' mom, Kate, first contacted me in January of this year, her sweet, almost 1 year old son, was still …

Episode 98: Meaning Making 2 (+ Bryson's Doctor)

July 29th, 2021


Over the past almost two years, I have interviewed dozens of bereaved parents. I have learned something from each and every one of them. All of them have done something they never thought possible after the deaths of …

Episode 97: Eliza's Mom

July 22nd, 2021


Imagine for just a moment that you are on a long-planned 'girls trip' to Las Vegas for a fun weekend with 10 of your closest friends from college. It …

Episode 96: Michael's Mom

July 15th, 2021


Marcie's son, Michael's, motto for life was as follows: 'The purpose of life is to help others through it.' Michael lived that motto every single day …

Episode 95: Grief Dreams

July 8th, 2021


Grief Dreams. What are they? What do they mean? Is it normal to have a grief dream? Is it normal not to dream of the deceased? These are questions that Dr. Joshua Black has been studying for  years now. Ever since he …

Episode 94: Daisy's Mom

July 1st, 2021


How can two girls who never met, had very little in common and who died 5 years apart bring two people together in friendship?

Daisy was a girl with a never-ending smile and a head covered with blonde curls. She was …

Episode 93: Berklee's Dad

June 24th, 2021


How do you go on when your whole world quite literally blows up in a second? When Shawn Maguire woke up one morning last September to make himself a …

Episode 92: Eleni's Mom

June 17th, 2021


For today's guest, Demetra, life changed the day her daughter was diagnosed with a rare condition called HHT (Hereditary Hemorrhagic Telangiectasia) at 7 years of age. Although many people live a long, happy life with …

Episode 91: Christian's Mom

June 10th, 2021


After her 16 year old son, Christian was killed in a car accident three years ago, Valerie was understandably devastated. She, like so many of us, …

Episode 90: Meaning Making

June 3rd, 2021


When Andy first died, I didn't want anything good to come from his death. I selfishly wanted everything about it to be 100% horrible. I didn't want there to be a silver lining. Perhaps that is why it annoyed me so much …

Episode 89: Joseph's Dad

May 27th, 2021


Dads are somewhat overlooked in the deaths of children in general, but this is especially true for stillborn deaths. Joseph's dad never got to meet his baby, Joseph, when he was alive. One day, when Lou's wife, …

Episode 88: Easton's Mom

May 20th, 2021


Easton's Mom, Alexandria, says that her young son, Easton saved her life not once, but twice. Theirs is a beautiful love story not unlike many …

Episode 87: Bryson's Mom

May 13th, 2021


'For some people, it takes 70 years for them to make an impact on the world; for Bryson, it took just 7.' - Amanda, Bryson's Mom

Over the past 20 …

Episode 86: Carly's Mom

May 6th, 2021


A butterfly lights beside us like a sun beam, and for one brief moment its glory and beauty belongs to our world. But then it flies on again, and …

Episode 85: Eesha's Mom

April 29th, 2021


Pregnancy with your first baby should be a fun, exciting time. For Farhana, unfortunately, this fun time lasted for only the first 22 weeks. It was …

Episode 84 - Ivan's Mom

April 22nd, 2021


Grieving the death of your child is horrific, but grieving it publicly is even worse. When Ivan died in his fraternity room while he was away at …

Episode 83: Alisha and Jason's Mom

April 15th, 2021


At first glance, Kelly's life seems incredibly scary after losing two of her four kids to tragic accidents eleven years apart. You may even think …

Episode 82: Sibling Grief

April 8th, 2021


Siblings are often referred to as 'the forgotten mourners.' People worry about the parents of a young person who dies. They worry about the spouse …

Episode 81: Bella's Dad

April 1st, 2021


'Any day that I get to talk about my child is a good day.' This is one of the many things that today's guest Jerry has learned from others when he has spoken to bereaved parents on his new podcast, 'The Nameless Minority

Episode 80: Levi's Mom

March 25th, 2021


Never in a million years did today's guest, Nicole, think that she could lose a child to drowning. She was a teacher and her husband, a physician. …

Episode 79: Eli's Mom

March 18th, 2021


When today's guest, Riley, learned that she was pregnant with twins after a two year struggle with fertility, she felt incredibly blessed. She went through 11 weeks of bedrest and went on to deliver two perfect, …

Episode 77: Andy's Mom & Charleigh's Grandma

March 4th, 2021


I felt an instant connection to today's guest, Maureen. The most obvious reason for this is that our sons share a name, Andy, and that they were both killed suddenly in tragic car accidents. Another similarity is due to …

Episode 76: TJ's Mom and Brother

February 24th, 2021


Mental illness and alcoholism often go hand in hand. When people struggle with depression and anxiety, turning to drugs or alcohol may seem like a …

Episode 75: Grief and Guilt

February 18th, 2021


As a working mom, I think I felt some type of guilt almost every day. I never felt like I was doing enough. I would feel guilty about not spending …

Episode 74: Daren's Mom

February 11th, 2021


'Paying it forward' is a phrase that is often used in our culture. Today's guest, Ann, says that has been the way she has always tried to live her …

Episode 73: Jimbo's Mom

February 4th, 2021


When friends were recently asked to talk about Carolyn's son, Jimmy (or Jimbo as many of his friends liked to call him), he was described as being a …

Episode 72: Ahsha's Mom

January 28th, 2021


Well-meaning people say these words to me all of the time - "You are so strong! I could never do what you do!" They mean that they admire me for what …

Episode 71: Robbie's Mom

January 21st, 2021


To say that losing a child is hard at any time would be a vast understatement, but losing a child while in the midst of a global pandemic adds a …

Episode 70: Rachel's Mom

January 14th, 2021


Michelle's daughter, Rachel, was just 17 years old when she died unexpectedly in a tragic accident. Packed in those 17 years, however, was a lifetime …

Episode 69: Jimmy's Mom

January 7th, 2021


On the home page of Salt Water's website,, there is a quote from Isak Dinesen which reads, 'The cure for everything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea.' It goes on to explain these each in more …

Episode 68: What I Wish I Had Known

December 31st, 2020


As we come to the end of 2020, it is a universal joke that everyone wants this year to be over because of the global coronavirus pandemic. "Bring on 2021," they say, "when life can return to normal!" For grieving …

Episode 67: Messages of Hope

December 24th, 2020


For grieving people, Christmastime is undoubtedly, NOT 'the most wonderful time of the year' that is sung about in the classic song. I would say that …

Episode 66: Daryn's Mom

December 17th, 2020


In 2007, today's guest, Kim, had a pretty comfortable life. She was happily married with three beautiful young children. She had gone back to school …

Episode 65: Zach's Mom

December 10th, 2020


Today's guest, Robyn Karns, knows hardship - she has experienced abuse, widowhood, a miscarriage, and divorce, but 17 months ago, her life was …

Episode 64: Isla's Mom

December 3rd, 2020


I have long hated the analogy of going through  a war when someone is diagnosed with cancer. 'He's battling cancer.' 'She is a fighter.' 'They beat cancer.' Those phrases all indicate that if you are a strong enough …

Episode 63: Kevin's Dad

November 25th, 2020


Do people get little signs from God or from loved ones after they die? There are strong feelings on both sides of this issue. Many people tell you that this is impossible, and those people use very different points to …

Episode 62: Hannah Christine's Mom

November 19th, 2020


I have often thought how nice it would be if I could just wear a sign around my neck that said, "I am grieving. My child is dead. Be nice to me." I …

Episode 61: Intimacy after Child Loss

November 12th, 2020


Today's episode is far different than the average Always Andy's Mom episode. We dive into a topic that I never would have considered on my own. About …

Episode 60: Sydney's Mom

November 5th, 2020


For most of my adult life, I had claimed Romans 8:28 as my own personal Bible verse. 'And we know that in all things God works for the good of those …

Episode 59: Hannah's Mom

October 29th, 2020


Waiting is hard. Ask any 5 year old who is waiting for Christmas, a birthday or even traveling in the car on a road trip. They wait impatiently, …

Episode 58: Joey - Pregnancy After Loss

October 22nd, 2020


My regular listeners know that some of my biggest pet peeves as a bereaved parent are the well-meaning platitudes given by others to try to offer …

Episode 57: Hunter's Mom

October 15th, 2020


When Luna contacted me a few short weeks ago, sharing that her son, Hunter, had died suddenly while he was sleeping, my heart broke for her as it does whenever I hear these tragic stories. I thought about the grief …

Episode 56: Isaac's Mom

October 8th, 2020


When today's guest, Crystal, found out that she was pregnant at a young age, she says that she thinks many people thought that her life was over. In some ways, I guess it was, but not in the way they supposed. From the …

Episode 55: Chad's Mom

October 1st, 2020


All people who have lost a close family member will likely have experienced working with a funeral director in those first hours and days after the …

Episode 54: Gwen -

September 24th, 2020


The days after Andy's death were such a blur to me. Information came at me from all directions. In those days leading up to what should have been his …

Episode 53: Melissa's Mom and Dad

September 17th, 2020


Until June 6, 2002, Dave and Sue Brannon had a life that many would envy. They had four beautiful children, a happy marriage, and a life that felt …

Episode 52: Emily's Hope Mom

September 10th, 2020


Living through the death of one's own child under any circumstances is certainly thought to be one of the most difficult events anyone could …

Episode 51: Chris' Mom

September 3rd, 2020


'I'm sorry. Despite our best efforts, we were unable to save your son.'

These words will sit with me for the rest of my life. I will never forget them, will never forget the regret and sadness in that paramedic's voice. …

Episode 50: Jordan's Mom

August 27th, 2020


Shame. Guilt. Fear of Judgment. Anger.

These are just some of the additional emotions that today's guest, Lisa, felt after the accidental overdose death of her son, Jordan, eleven years ago. As my listeners all know, …

Episode 49: Caleb's Mom at 1 year

August 20th, 2020


Birthdays, holidays and anniversaries are all incredibly difficult to live through after the death of your child. We dread them. We count the days …

Episode 48: Greg's Sister

August 13th, 2020


Recently, I have been thinking a lot about the fact that I live in a grieving home, and I am continuing to raise my children in a grieving home and that there is nothing that I can do to change that. It is just not the …

Episode 47: Tamzyn and Jacque's Mom

August 6th, 2020


I will never forget the subject line of the email sent by today's guest, Charne, a few weeks ago. It simply read, 'Lightning Struck Twice.' Charne's journey with grief started 8 years ago when her youngest daughter died …

Episode 46: Adam's Mom

July 30th, 2020


Honestly, today's interview was a sort of scary prospect for me. I don't like thinking too far into the future. Ten years, twenty years, thirty years, even the idea of having that much time without Andy in my life and …

Episode 45: David's Dad

July 23rd, 2020


The words 'grief' and 'improv' are certainly ones that do not naturally seem to go together. When I think of grief, I think of extreme sadness. I might also think of guilt, anger or numerous other negative emotions. …

Episode 44: Rory's Mom

July 16th, 2020


One day, almost 3 year old, red-headed Rory was outside playing while on a family vacation to Florida. She suddenly fell to the ground and cried out. …

Episode 43: Finding Encouragement

July 9th, 2020


Strength and courage are two very powerful words. Those words conjure up images in my mind of a person physically strong and without fear, perhaps a …

Episode 42: Keyan's Mom at 3 Years

July 2nd, 2020


When I sat down to plan my summer podcast schedule, July 2nd stood out to me right away. July 2, 2017 was the day that Stephanie's daughter Keyan …

Episode 41: Johnny's Mom

June 24th, 2020


On the night 7 year old Johnny was diagnosed with a brain tumor, his mom asked him if he was scared. He said that he was and went on to say that he …

Episode 40: Dobbs and Reed's Mom

June 18th, 2020


Sometimes I end an interview just feeling better - better about myself, better about God and better about life in general. Today is one of those days and one of those interviews. The first thing a noticed when I started …

Episode 39: Emily's Mom

June 11th, 2020




Burgundy bushes

Forest green pines

Pale blue spruce

white, white snow shadows bruised from winters tussles

Oak leaves, stubbornly refusing to let go;

Clinging like a shriveled cluster of dried raisins

Green, …

Episode 38: Haddie's Mom

June 4th, 2020


Haddie was a happy, bright-eyed, inquisitive baby. Her smile would light up a room. She was more quiet than her older sister, described by her mom as …

Episode 37: What is Lament?

May 28th, 2020


What is lament and what does it mean to experience lament?

After Andy died, I would find myself on the floor in his room sobbing uncontrollably. …

Episode 36: Willow's Mom

May 21st, 2020


Today, I have the honor to introduce my listeners to my good friend, Willow's mom. I know her as Megan, but she shared that to so many people from 2012-2018, Megan was simply known as Willow's mom. She spent her life …

Episode 35: Anna's Mom

May 14th, 2020


Recently, I feel like my grief journey has been harder rather than easier. It is difficult to know why that is the case. Is it because it has now …

Episode 34: Dalton's Mom

May 7th, 2020


Today, I have the privilege to talk with Roni Lambrecht, the delightful, award-winning author of the book, Parenting at Your Best Without Regrets. …

Episode 33: Aria's Mom

April 30th, 2020


Upon opening Aria's mom's website,, the very first words read, 'One day, I was the mother of 3 children, then in one moment I …

Episode 32: Leart's Mom

April 23rd, 2020


On today's episode, I have the privilege to talk with Rezarta, Leart's mom. Leart died just this past November on the 21st from complications …

Episode 31: Ryan's Mom and Dad

April 16th, 2020


Ryan was almost 7 years old and on a typical father/son bike ride with his dad, Andy, when he was hit by a truck and killed while crossing the street …

Episode 30: Tatum's Mom

April 1st, 2020


Tatum was 13 months old when he died early Christmas morning just over three months ago. Much of Tatum's short life was spent in the hospital due to …

Episode 29: Grieving in a Pandemic

March 26th, 2020


After a week off due to the COVID pandemic and the stresses surrounding it, I decided to restart the podcast. I tried stuffing my grief down deep into myself, feeling like it was not important enough to give any …

Episode 28: Max's Mom

March 11th, 2020


Today on Always Andy's Mom, I talk with Shan, whose first-born son, Max, died at 15 months of age from Sudden Unexplained Death in Epilepsy. Max was a healthy, growing boy until having his first seizure at 8 months of …

Episode 27: Andy's Director/Charlie's Brother

March 5th, 2020


Music. It carries such emotion for me and so many others. I remember thinking even at a young age that Andy 'felt' music. When all three kids would …

Episode 26: Eddie's Mum

February 27th, 2020


In today's episode of Always Andy's Mom, we go international for the first time. My guest is Eddie's mum, Jennifer from the UK. Jennifer reached out to me over Twitter last month. It is her goal, as well as mine, to …

Episode 25: Anne Cathryn's Mom

February 20th, 2020


Episode 25. It is sort of hard to believe that I have met this milestone. Overall, I know that I just started publishing episodes 5 short months ago, but what has been accomplished actually blows me away. I now have …

Episode 24: Tommy's Mom

February 13th, 2020


Tommy was a joyful 2 year old with a contagious belly laugh. He always raced around the house and neighborhood chasing after his two older brothers …

Episode 23: Connor's Mom

February 6th, 2020


Today's episode of Always Andy's Mom is, for me, one of the most emotional episodes I have had to date. Connor's mom, Nan, describes him in a way that reminds me of Andy. He was the middle child of three, all born two …

Episode 22: Alec's Mom

January 30th, 2020


Today, I talk with Tara, Alec's mom, whose story is actually more similar to mine when compared to any of my guests so far. Alec, like Andy, was an …

Episode 21: Dustan's Dad

January 23rd, 2020


Today on Losing a Child: Always Andy's Mom, I have the pleasure to speak with Dustan's Dad, Jason Colyer. Dustan was a very special young man who …

Episode 20: You're NOT going crazy!

January 16th, 2020


'I think I'm going crazy. I'm going crazy. I am definitely going crazy!' 

These are the thoughts that would go through my head starting several weeks …

Episode 19: Caleb's Mom

January 9th, 2020


Today, as I publish this episode, Crissy's beloved son, Caleb, has been gone for 150 days, having died by suicide last year on August 12th. Undoubtedly, these has been the longest, worst days of Crissy's life, of her …

Episode 18: Andy's Dad - A New Year

January 2nd, 2020


'Happy New Year' is a phrase that has been said a lot over the past day and a half all over the world. I used to throw that phrase around, too, along …

Episode 17: Messages of Hope

December 19th, 2019


To be honest, last Tuesday when I was scheduled to meet with other grieving mothers to record this episode, I was not feeling very hopeful at all. As …

Episode 16: Grief Reiki

December 12th, 2019


Until a few weeks ago, I had never heard of the term, reiki. I noticed that I was being followed by a woman on Twitter, @GriefReiki. I began …

Episode 15: Alexander's Mom

December 5th, 2019


On today's episode of Losing a Chid: Always Andy's Mom, I talk with Alexander's Mom, Nancy. She is one amazing lady with an amazing sense of humor. I …

Episode 14: Derek's Mom

November 28th, 2019


Today is Thanksgiving Day here in the United States, a day in which we are supposed to feel grateful and thankful for all that we have. For a …

Episode 13: Camilo's Dad

November 21st, 2019


On today's episode of Losing a Child: Always Andy's Mom, I talk to Camilo's dad, Doug Van Doren. Since recording the first episode with my husband Eric, I have only spoken with women, so it was nice to get another dad's …

Episode 12: Surviving the Holidays

November 14th, 2019


On today's episode, Gwen and I discuss the struggles of getting through the holidays with a heart that is grieving and broken. Grieving is hard work …

Episode 11: Nathan's Mom

November 7th, 2019


On today's episode, I talk with Michele Shedd, Nathan's mom. Michele knew from her 20 week ultrasound that her infant son had a condition that would …

Episode 10: James' Mom

October 31st, 2019


On this the last day of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month, I have a guest who understands this loss in ways that most people never will. Jessica Tosh lost her infant son, James, after just 2 months of life. …

Episode 9: Brooke's Mom

October 24th, 2019


On this episode of Losing A Child: Always Andy's Mom, I talk with Brooke's mom, Judy Breen. Unlike most of my previous guests, Judy's daughter, …

Episode 8: Eric's Mom

October 17th, 2019


Kim Harm's 19 year old son, Eric, looked like he had everything going for him. He was a smart, talented jazz pianist who had just finished his first …

Episode 7: Jenny and Angie's Sister

October 10th, 2019


On today's episode, I speak with my dear friend, Michele Thorson. Michele and I became friends shortly after I moved to Grand Rapids, 15 years ago. Michele's mother had recently died and my mother had died about 10 …

Episode 6: Jack's Mom

October 3rd, 2019


In today's episode, I speak with Jack's mom, Anna Whiston-Donaldson. Jack died in 2011 at the age of 12 in a freak flash flood while playing at a …

Episode 5: Gwen - The Early Days

September 27th, 2019


Today's episode is the first of several where Gwen and I discuss specific topics related to grief. We decided to start at the beginning, those horrible first few days after the death of a child or another loved one. …

Episode 4: Seth's Mom

September 22nd, 2019


In this Episode of Always Andy's Mom, I talk with Jolynn Van Wienen and hear the story of her son, Seth. Seth was killed in 2007 when he was 10 years …

Episode 3 - Keyan's Mom

September 15th, 2019


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In this episode, I talk with Stephanie Hogan, whose 12 year old daughter died two …

Episode 2 - Gwen Kapcia on Grief

August 29th, 2019


Gwen Kapcia, a social worker and certified thanatologist (study of death and dying), will be a regular contributor to the Always Andy's Mom podcast. …

Episode 1: Andy's Dad

August 28th, 2019


In this first episode of Losing a Child: Always Andy's Mom, Marcy interviews her husband Eric, and they discuss the death of their son, Andy, who died tragically in a car accident in August 2018. They discuss how they …

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