Life (UN)Closeted: LGBTQ & Heterosexual Coming Out Stories & Advice for coming out of life's closets!

At 16 you almost die from a from a crazy motorcycle accident. At 18 you take a risk and say, "I'm outta here (with a South African Accent)." Before you know it, you're in America, then off to the UK with minor stops …

Leadership. We hear this term thrown around alot these days. It means many things to many people, and in different contexts it takes on lots of different meanings. But what does LGBTQ Leadership look like. "What unique …

What’s getting lost in society? Empathy? Understanding? Patience? All true, but what about listening with deep intention and trying to understand one another more. There’s so much noise and chatter in the world, on …

Who are you? Seems like a pretty easy question to answer, but most of us rattle of the standard answers. Father, mother, executive, cyclist, etc. The stuff that is part of the truth of who you are, but what is …

Things just aren't working. Well they are but something was still missing. There's a drive to do more, be more, and stop living by what other people …

Life sucks. The kids won't get ready for school. The car has a flat tire. Your boss hands you another project that of course has to be done by the …

It happens. Sometimes a straight spouse marries gay spouse and vice-versa. Is it intentional? Maybe. Is it hurtful? Can be. Regardless of the reasons …

He's almost 20 years into his coming out journey, she's little over 3. They've both found love, gone through the tough stuff, and have managed to thrive and survive. Your host Rick Clemons, coming out coach, and his …

Deep in the heart of Kansas, there's a transformation of acceptance going on. Women dressing as women but glammed up like nobody's bizness! Nothing unusual you might say! Tis true to some degree sugah's but when the men …

Imagine that you make the decision to be a parent. Only there's one problem. You're going to have to jump through some extraordinary hoops to get there. For starters Fatherhood means there's two daddies in the equation, …

Coming out is scary enough. You have tons of questions, and with the right people, you'll feel comfortable asking those questions. But sometimes you have those questions that you just want to ask, but either don't know …

When love is love and who you are is who you are collides, your first thought might be, this sounds like another LGBTQ story. It is, with a twist. …

Imagine being a pop sensation. An Asian Pop Star in Korea. You've got a rising career, showed off your washboard abs on the cover of Men's Health Magazine, to become known the Best of the East. Sounds awesome, right? …

Sometimes the bolder move of coming out of the closet is something that you can’t see and others can’t see in you. When we say, “See,” we mean, you …

Today I'm closing chapters on the weekly Rant and Riffs segments. Don't worry, those segments will still show up from time to time, but it's time to let it go and focus on my new podcast 40 Plus: Real Men. Real Talk. …

Abuse. Entrapment. Feeling trapped in life. No way out. Not even a possibility of feeling Beyonce' FIERCE. All of these feelings and life situations leads you to a point of being downtrodden, scared and ragged victim, …

Appetizers. Main course. Side Dishes. Desert. Sounds like it's a full blown brunch. Now put your imagination caps on, and see that brunch buffet as …

Shhh. Don't stare. He's weird. She's crazy. They're not normal. Sounds like something kids say to each other. Yeah right. We adults do that too. Make …

Right wing. Left wing. Democrats. Republicans. Extremists. Conservatives. We have more in common than we think. But, I'm admitting something that is a deep dark secret of mine today. I've got quite a bit in common with …

Race. There's not a headline in the news today that deal with some form of race relations. But what happens when Race Play - a form of fetish play - goes awry? Many things that actually evoke feelings, insights, and …

You'd be lying if you said, "I've never been bullied!" Hate to say it, we all have a bully. What might surprise you is that bully resides within.

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Once a bully, always a bully. But once bullied, doesn't mean you have to stand for being bullied. Not now, not ever.

Even in a world that seems the …

Three of the most used words in the English language are...I don't know. You don't? I don't either. Not sure that statement is true, but I do know that way to many of us say, "I don't know..." way to much. I'm guilty as …

Imagine living a life of abuse - mental, cult religion, and hidden mixed orientation marriage - where all you did was feel neglected. Now imagine …

What does it mean to live in a space of where you feel limitless? If you listed to episode 370 with my friend Laura Gassner Otting, you know her new book -Limitless: How to Ignore Everybody, Carve Your Own Path, and …

What if success doesn't equal happiness? What if happiness doesn't grow on trees? What if you live your life believing you can't do, blah, blah, blah? What if the problem is you and not seeing that you are limitless?

…

Honestly, there's a lot of humanity damaging going on in the good old USA these days. Mostly from the political arena. Now with the Mueller …

All of us, in some way, shape, or form in our lives have been perceived as different. Yet, nothing is more painful to a child than to be perceived as …

Depression. Stigma. Shame. Misery. If you suffer with depression you know the stigma, shame, and misery depression causes in your life. To often those feelings lead you to hate your depression and try to fight it. Truth …

Shame on you! How many of us heard those words as kids? All right, maybe not so much these days, as I think that was the type of phrase us Baby Boomers heard growing up, but today the SHAME FACTOR is prevalent …

To often we oblige for all the wrong reasons. Today I give you 3 steps for Curing Unhealthy Obliging. These steps came out of the podcast interview I recently did with Jeff Goins on Episode 364, where he discovered, so …

Imagine, saying to yourself, “Nothing I’ve ever done has felt like a success." Then, as soon as the words escaped your lips, you feel like a hypocrite. Tons of people envy you. Your accomplishments stack up like a Jenga …

Once a year we have the opportunity to celebrate women across the globe and contribute to raising awareness about gender bias on International Women's Day. It's time to uncloset disrespect of women, and celebrate their …

Flying. Minimalism. Sobriety. Adventure. Each one of those things is about taking flight to live an epic life and helping others live their version of an epic life. Quiet a mixed bag of tricks, eh? Yet, when it all gets …

What happens when you get stuck in fear, don't do the thing you most want to do, and you find yourself continuing to apologize for your life? If you …

Coming out is a challenge. It’s sticky, icky, and sometimes a blissful happy trail. Regardless of how the journey goes, guidance is always helpful. …

Headline news about Jussie Smollett has us all questioning what's happening here in America, especially, as it pertains to race, LGBTQ issues, and …

Imagine practicing radical kindness. Now imagine others being kind and also practicing radical kindness. What would our world be like if we all …

We all have dreams. Vision of things that we say we want to do. Heck just this past week we heard from Chase Boehringer how his bucket list lifestyle, not only saved his life, but is not his dream calling. Yet, what he …

Darkness. Despair. Depression. Divorce. Sounds pretty gloomy and not anything that anyone would but on their bucket list. It was gloomy, ugly, and …

If you aren't having fun and thinking you aren't creative, then you're in good company. Most of us forget to have fun. Life gets in the way, demands take over, and before you know it work, eat, sleep; work, eat, sleep; …

Imagine at 23 you land a gig at the White House. That may or not excite you depending on who’s sitting in the oval office, but, play along here for a moment. You got this gig at the White House, not because you had an …

I know some of you are probably going to balk at this. Go ahead. Balk, balk, balk. But the truth is, most fears in life are short-lived and self-created. Think about it. When fears show up, most the time nothing happens …

Darkness. The kind that causes you to retreat into yourself because you’ve been bullied so much you actually believe that you’re worthless. You’ve …

Let's be clear. Transgender discrimination is discrimination, plain and simple. Lacking kindness, empathy, compassion is what Transgender discrimination represents. Those three human characteristics are all that is …

We all desire to go our own way. Doesn't matter if it is in love, work, or life in general. But there's this little, big word that holds us back - …

If you haven't been on social media or watching the news the past couple of days, there's been a viral explosion. Not about Trump or Theresa may. It's about razors. Or let's say about one of the biggest consumer brands …

Who are you? One of the biggest questions we can ask ourselves, but it is an especially big question for gay men who often find themselves caught up in the world of material goods, great bodies, and always looking to …

I'm a disruptor. I'm also a believer in there is no "NORMAL." But that's me, and quite a few of my coaching clients, and other people that tend to hang out in my circle. We disrupt, we don't see anything as normal, and …

We all have our own insecurities about fitting in, in life and especially at work. It can be a frickin' challenge when you don't have the warm fuzzies that you can be part of the team and it gets in the way of how you …

Four days into the New Year. Some resolutions have already hit wall, some goals are lost in the past, and you might be struggling to even get …

Food, shelter. Two basic needs that we all need to survive. Now imagine, fighting to be able to find a home and live in a place that makes you feel secure, only to discover that you can’t because of your sexuality or …

We’ve all struggled with confidence and being who we are. Shame, guilt, comparisons all get in the way of our happiness. Then one day we discover we’ve been sucked into success as for of happiness, rather than letting …

Toxic people don't take a break at the holidays. In fact the own their toxicity and show up when you least expect it and need it. In fact, that's …

Life keeps moving along. Her job brings you joy. She travels every chance she gets. She’s consistently doing the inner work to bring herself closer …

Vulnerability. Everyone seems to be talking about it these days. Or maybe it's just the circles I run in. The truth is, vulnerability is a gift. …

One day you wake up and realize that self-care is not an option. It is a must. All the fun, fun, fun of drinking and partying has turned into another disastrous wake-up call on Monday morning where your child looks at …

Boy Erased, starring Lucas Hedges, Nicole Kidman, Russell Crowe, and Joel Edgerton, explores the story of the son of a Baptist preacher is forced to …

It’s been awhile since we’ve done a “He said, she said” or a “Coach To Coach” segment. But when I was contact by Anne-Marie Zanzal, I knew it was …

I used to love reading Curious George when I was a kid. Then, somehow the stars aligned and I married a guy named George and he always invites me to be curious, rather than jumping to assumptions, or conclusions. Thanks …

Imagine knowing exactly what someone is thinking. Or, at least having a pretty good idea of what they are thinking, all because their body speaks …

Have you ever found yourself asking for permission? Of course you have. The better question is, have you ever found yourself not giving yourself permission? Yeah! The permission to do something you really want to do. …

Imagine coming into the world, just as your Father made a major life detour. His detour, one of shame in the world, was unbeknownst to you until the age of 13. By then, you’ve been socialized to believe that everything …

Nothing is perfect. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. But we all know that, yet we pursue perfection and allow it to drive us batty. It's such a waste of …

Kindness. At times it seems to be elusive. Especially in our world today. People from all walks of life seem more divisive and at odds with one …

I know the future, I never encounter anything unexpected, and I am fully in control of what is to come. Yeah right! But don't we wish that were true? …

Imagine, in the land of imagination – Hollywood – that LGBTQ characters have leading roles that are never based on stereotypes. That the main …

I'm never confused. You're never confused. We're all never confused. So why do we need to call Confusion Busters? Because we're all lying! And, we all hate being in a state of confusion. Or at least most of us do. Those …

I want you to imagine just for a moment a Nun. Now I want you to imagine an order of Nuns that knows no gender, embraces all spiritual affiliations, and whose practices included service, education, activism, …

Two words, "Admit It" can fix so many things. Yet we don't like to admit things as humans. And then before you know it, we repress crap and then …

We all want to be seen. We all want to be loved. We all want to be connected. And when we don’t feel seen, we forget to see ourselves for who we are and be content with that. Yet, sometimes we need little reminders …

I realized, through all the crap that is going on in our country and the world, that I know these people. People who don't love themselves, let their egos get in the way, and they forget what it means to be human. Do …

Innocence lost. Adulting too much. Then suddenly you’re stressed, searching for your passion, and feeling like you’re getting nowhere. All because, …

I've been really risk averse the past few months. In fact I haven't been eating my own dog food. I've been letting the bullshit of my thoughts steer …

This story isn’t new. It’s been told many, many, many times. But it needs to be told again. There’s no better time than the present and on National …

Coming Out. It’s scary. Electrifying. Confusing. Life changing. It’s about thriving vs. hiding. Taking a stand to live rather than die. But most of all it’s about being you, 100% you, no matter what the odds, the snide …

We all have, or at least most of us, have heard the saying, "When the student becomes the teacher and the teacher becomes the student!" Well I had …

Cast aside traditional roles of womanhood, motherhood, and house wifery. There’s a new gal in town, and she’s the empowered trans woman. A woman who …

You would have to been hiding under a rock, here in the US, to have not seen the circus playing out around Supreme Court Nominee Brett Kavanaugh's …

What happens when you don’t date in high school, because you have to keep your crushes and dating life hidden because you are gay? For starters you …

Living life on your terms, making your bold moves, not settling for the status quo, all require one thing…a strong Hell Yes to give yourself, or …

Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. How many times have you heard those words said to you when you were a child, by your parent. Or, how often have you said that to your own child? But, in this day and age, with the wisdom of …

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can preach the "make your bold move" message, but even I at times need to be told to eat my own dog food. That's precisely what I …

Sure. Parenthood is a choice for most of us. Except for those unexpected surprises. But when you finally decide, there’s no time like the present, even if you are about to peak out of the 30-something years, find …

If you haven't heard, the Catholic Church is having some problems. Overtly sexual indiscretion problems. Hey it happens. But it shouldn't. This …

This is one of those, I knew him when moments. I knew him when he was trying to find himself. I knew him when he helped me with my social media. I knew him when he was in dark times. I knew him when I saw him come …

I know some of you are probably going to balk at this. Go ahead. Balk, balk, balk. But the truth is, most sh*t in life is short-lived and self-created. Think about it. When stuff happens, how of it was because of …

Have you ever wished you could find a place to learn, grow, let go, connect and enjoy absolute bliss and ecstatic pleasure? Sounds great doesn’t it! …

Honestly, none of likes having sh*t happening in our lives. It's stressful, frustrating, annoying and most of all isn't fun. However, when we realize …

Gosh I’m a fraud. I don’t want anyone to know I don’t know it all? And, I sure the heck don’t want to screw up in front of my friends. I just don’t get how everyone else has such a perfect life except me? Sound …

We've talked about 7 ways to get your sh*t together. But this one is a true winner. It's going to require that you look to your past, but don't get caught up in the crap of the past. It's about looking back when …

Imagine being a boy forced to attend school dressed in a girls’ uniform. Imagine being a girl banned from the girls’ bathroom and too afraid to “go” …

If you can't get your S*it together, it might be because you are negotiating way to much in your life. Giving in, letting things be OK instead of great, not standing up for yourself or your values. And then you want to …

Some people are gifted, then some people are gifted with the gift of gab. So what do you do when you are from Southern Oklahoma, have the gift of gab, and love to act…you move to Beverly Hills of course. Well maybe you …

The year was 2012. On a whim and a nudge from my friend Leah Jantzen I embarked on the journey of an internet radio show entitled "The Coming Out Lounge." 26 shows later I decided I was done, but, as with most good …

We've all been in jobs where we roll our eyes, wonder who's on first, and just say in our heads, "Screw it. I'm just here to get a paycheck!" …

Today we continue to explore the real truths as to why you can't get your shit together. I'm sorry to be so blunt. Oh wait. No I'm not, and I'm not …

Sometimes you’ve got to chase your dreams, make a bold move, and focus on two things that you find make you happy. For some that might be eating …

Ok, you're stuck and trying to figure out your next steps for getting your shit together. Over and over again you make a run at it and before you know it, you're still stuck. But it's not really you that's stuck, it's …

Where does never following conventions or bowing down to peer pressure lead you? To start a London-based theatre company despite never having …

OMG. This is my worst nightmare, and probably yours too, but you may not be admitting it yet. We are a society addicted to making excuses. Yes addicted. Shocking as that may seem, we make excuses, like we change our …

The truth is, once you make a bold move, you’ve got the blueprint, and you can keep those bold moves coming. Doesn’t mean it’s a piece of cake, or …

You're struggling to get on track. It's a part of getting your shit together, but one thing that just keeps creeping up is the constant CONFUSION. …

No one likes conflict. No one. But, it’s a necessary part of making bold moves and needed to live your life uncloseted. And that’s the truth. Nothing …

Continuing our exploration of 10 Brutally Honest, Non-Scientific, No Guru Needed Ways to Get your Shit Together, today we dive into magical mystical world of PERMISSION! Not PERMISSION from others, but the oft …

Go to college. Get a degree. Get a job. Get married. Yada, yada, yada. That’s what we’re supposed to do. Or at least that’s what most people are told …

Here's the thing. None of us really has our shit together. We all have shit, shit, shit in our lives. So don't let anyone tell you they've totally got it together. But when you don't feel like you do have your shit …

It’s a story that’s been told. Yet so many still believe there’s no reason to tell this story again. That’s complete bullshit. These stories need to …

This one is for the guys...but you ladies can listen to, as I'm calling forth the men of the world to make a bold move and step out of their bullshit …

Nothing new about being a single, divorced Dad…unless you’re gay. Then all sorts of tricky things happen, that the average person doesn’t think about. Like, He’s gay and has a child? He’s divorced and gay and has a …

The hands of time seem to be spinning backwards at an alarming rate. Hate, discrimination, violence towards people of color has become a norm, and …

You’ve got a secret. A secret that makes you happy, fulfilled, but may make others think you don’t have a heart. People like your kids, parents, …

It's Pride Month. Or at least that's what those of us in the LGBTQI community call it. Not sure what Drumph and his cronies in Washington are going to say this year, since they didn't' really say anything last year. But …

Have you ever asked yourself - Who am I? Why am I here? What am I truly capable of? What do I really want? If so, you are not alone. In fact, most of …

The reside everywhere. In our heads, in our relationships, at work, our friendships. No matter where you turn there is a cynic ready to tear apart your joy, your ideas, your happiness. No biggie. You've got something to …

Imagine leaving your job of 11 years, getting rid of your apartment, and packing up and heading off to Thailand with no real plans other than to …

I've been called a Buddha. Not because of my enlightenment. Because of my size. Ok, somewhat because I have some wisdom - but I'm still no Buddha.  However, I do have the kind of wisdom that comes from learning life …

You’ll never make a bold move, take that risk, or do what you say you’re going to do unless you just say, screw it, good enough is good enough. But …

My ego has almost killed me. Several times in my life. Then I started to see it as a wake up call to bigger things. To more honest and authentic ways of showing up in the world. It still gets in the way, but what …

Sure gay marriage is a constitutional right…at least for now. And if you monitor pop culture, you might think that LGBTQ folks are just a standard …

Have you ever really thought about what you wear and the signal that sends out to the world? Are you buttoned up, or super stylish? Frumpy or making a statement? It's very interesting to observe the world of our …

Do the time. Tow the line. And of course, “If there is no struggle, there is no progress.”  All great words of wisdom. But when you’re in the struggle, no words seem to do the trick. That’s why changing your …

The imprints we leave with the words we use can scar anyone for life, but for sure, the words a parent says can have a huge impact. Listen to learn how a Father may have just set the tone for his son's life with the …

You do what you believe you’re meant to do – follow a certain career path, pursue the love of your life, build a family you’ve always dreamed of, and …

Nothing happens until you allow the "un-" in your life to be part of the journey. What is the "un-"? You're just going to have to listen and learn why the "un-'s" are such an important part of doing anything in life, …

It’s hot. You’re cranky. Hormones are raging. You’re not pregnant. Your body says it going to mess with ya on a daily basis. And on top of that you just feel like you need a IV of Martini’s to make it through the day. …

On our last Riff and Rant, I shared 5 comparisons for determining how to say a BOLD NO! You could actually use those to say YES too. However, this …

What turns you on? Sex? Passions? Dreams? Or maybe it’s living a nomad, gypsy like life where you allow life to just take you where it feels right. …

Have you ever found yourself saying, "No," and then realizing you wish you'd said yes. Or maybe, doing the reverse. Saying "Yes," when you wish you'd said, "No?" Of course you have. We all do. In fact I just did it this …

What is my passion? Why do I struggle to follow mine? Is passion necessary for me to have a happy life? These are all questions that most of us ask …

It's spring. Bold colors are starting to pop up everywhere you look (hopefully). And, with the onset of spring it got me thinking, what does BOLD …

Waterpolo, Law, and plans…nothing is as it seems. But what’s the deal with plans…why are they so damn important…or not? Maybe because we think if we …

A friend of mine inspired this rant. It's about allowing the past to catch up to your present so that you can make the BOLD MOVE you are meant to make. In Barbara's journey she came back to her roots and then made the …

20 years ago a hot dog impacted his life. Yes I said a hot dog. This hot dog was so impactful it caused him to come out of his closet…bun and all.

No …

Bravo. Bravo. Bravo. So proud of our youth for taking a stand and saying enough is enough. #NATIONALWALKOUTDAY occurred just two days ago, yet the impact will move on...or at least let's hope so. In fact, that is what …

If you don’t respect yourself ain’t nobody else going to respect ya either…no matter how pretty yo face is or isn’t. And even if your own parents don’t respect who you are, then sometimes you just gotta sashay away and …

Last week on the Uncloseted Riff and Rant we got you comfortable dumping crap into your F*CK IT BUCKET that was getting in the way of you making your …

Whether you own a business, desire to, or find yourself up to your armpits in being an Entrepreneur, one thing for sure that you may not realize. A majority of your problems exist because you won’t come out of the …

Done. Just done. Not going to do it. You just want to say F*ck It! We've all been there and it sucks. But...when you us the power of F*ck It to move you forward. something interesting happens. Come explore with me today …

He's our President, like it or not. But he's also not checking himself, but yet he's being his bold self, like it or not. Today, I take a stab at the …

Life is full of shit storms. We all have them and they can’t be avoided, no matter how much we try. In fact sometimes bursts in to flames delivering …

The shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida reveals another closet. One that has gun control, mental health, settling …

There’s a thread that connects us all. In fact there’s a red thread about finding your soulmate. But here’s what I learned about Red Threads from …

From gay sex scandals, to #METOO movements, it seems the flood gates of HYPOCRISY of overflowing, and truth be said, "Everyone's coming out of the closet as a hypocrite." Well everyone except you and me of course. Wait, …

What is spirituality? How do you tap it? Is it religion? Ironically, these are all questions that, only you can answer for you. And that’s where it can get confusing, exciting, become an adventure, and also be a …

The #METOO movement is everywhere we look. It's a sign that shit is coming out of the closet that needs to come out. Women have had it. From …

We’ve all left something behind. Yet, it takes some nerve, grit and determination to pack up, move across country, start a brand new Chiropractic Practice all in the aftermath of a car accident and while living on …

I got super glued this week. It sucked, was a little painful, and opened my eyes. It also gave me good fodder to rant about this week. Led to the …

Prison was not on the “goal chart” of entrepreneur Trish Jenkins. Conned by a fraud and a breach of the Corporations Act meant losing her …

This episode is brought to you by Masha E. (pronounced "Mosh" like mosh pit), a new listener to Life Uncloseted. She sent me an email about her bold …

Imagine being that kid in school who loved to help others, innocently over contributed, and being labeled as disruptive, simply because you wanted to …

This is a short riff and rant that is brought to you by my youngest daughter. Well honestly by my youngest daughter's birthday. It's simply my thoughts on what the true essence of a birthday is all about and how it …

Let’s jump right to the truth - Real love starts with you. In order to attract a life partner and build a healthy intimate relationship, you must first become a good partner to yourself.

However, many of us enter into …

2018 is moving forward. Your bold move is waiting for you. but what gets in the way and how can you get past the fear of making a bold move. Here's …

Making bold moves and living a life uncloseted, doesn’t take magic. It takes determination, belief, trust, and…a few good books.

To get the year …

As we enter the last holiday weekend of 2017, I could go all "Goal-Oriented," or "Make Your Resolutions" stick, on ya, but I won't. I don't believe …

We all hear it but do we listen? Communication is key. Yet part of what keeps us playing small and not making the bold moves in life is that we can’t …

We're just a couple of days away from the Holiday - Christmas. For many of you, you've already celebrated the holiday - Hanukkah. And for all of us, …

This ain’t no fiction. It’s actually pretty damn truthful. Gay men, too often put themselves in a closet of only being attracted to the outside …

Today I'm sharing 5 key ingredients for making a BOLD MOVE. These are lessons I've learned as I've been boldly making a move from one house to …

Imagine having little to no money…and starting a business. Ok, you’ve heard it before, but what you may not have heard is to come out of the closet …

Life and moving out of old homes and into new ones are full of contingencies. So how do you use the contingencies? To your advantage or as a crutch …

If you’ve ever felt flawed, broken, trying to make the best sense of your life, then it’s not surprising if you feel your life is on fire. Whether you’re struggling with sexuality, death, obsessions, religion, …

It's becoming an epidemic. Sexual harassment, innuendo, even exposing oneself to another human being in the workplace. Women are crying foul and …

Imagine for a moment, that the closet you live in is your own body. A body that keeps you hostage and you had no control over when you were taken …

I'm thankful I didn't eat or drink as much as I usually do on Thanksgiving. But, I'm also thankful I did a little impromptu Facebook poll to see what …

Sometimes it takes crashing and burning to find your path to freedom. To live a life uncloseted.

That crash make take on the form of leaving a record label, moving away from a relationship based purely on lust, and …

There are five types of buyers at Garage Sales. These five types of buyers are also the five types of personalities that approach making bold moves …

Eating healthy, exercise, being fit. One way to look at life. Or, you can see it as another damn diet, exercise that you hate, and “I’m never going to be fit, so why bother?” Welcome the closet of personal well-being …

We all love opportunities. Opportunities to grow, travel, explore, laugh, eat, etc. Each of has our own list of perfect opportunities that we wish …

Imagine the only way to live your life uncloseted means, failing, with a capital F. Going from creating what’s anticipated to be a Hollywood …

Ever had ringing of the ears? It's called Tinnitus. It's annoying. Like a pebble in a shoe annoying. But, it's also led me to an interesting observation. Many of the ways you can avoid Tinnitus also can help you face …

Too often the world sees rebellion as an act to get attention or to buck the system just for bucking the systems sake. Yet, when we rebel with intention, out of a desire to be who we are, the way we are, and as our …

Ironically, certainty is fleeting. Even more ironic, uncertainty drives us batting. So what is one to do? Well I've got some ideas and solutions that …

Impact. That was one of the first words I realized was the reason I had to live my life uncloseted. Then, I happened upon a book entitled, The Art of Non-Conformity, and I knew I had found a voice, a spirit, and a …

We're all hustling away from or towards something, each and everyday. A lot of us are also hustling things on the side. Is that a good or a bad thing? Not sure it's either, but it can be. Join me today as I explore how …

We all get constrained. Stuck. Shackled by life. But what happens when we finally take the bold step to say, “NO MORE!” That’s the day we start to …

If anything goes wrong today, blame it on Friday The 13th, then forgive it. I know, forgiveness is easier said than done...until you listen to this episode.

I've been going through a lot of forgiveness stuff these past …

It’s time to learn a lesson. Are you listening? Whether it’s a lover, a friend, or family member, those relationships that we think defines us, often …

Fact: you've got 168 hours in a week available to you. Fact: You probably aren't using all those hours to your maximum potential. Truth: We can all do better at using our time...especially to come out of the closets of …

Life is a series of transitions. Every day we wake up to new challenges, adventures, and directions. For some of us, those transitions lead not only to a physical transition but also to our life’s work that we’ve been …

To0 often, the crap of life is because we simply can't let something go. I recently sat down with a music artist who inspired this post, and realized, so often, my own stress, frustrations, anxiety, stems from my …

Imagine being in a foreign country, learning to stumble through the language barriers, adjusting to cultural expectations, and realizing that you’re …

A quick visit to support my friend, and inspiration guy, Chris Guillebeau, on his book tour for his new book Side Hustle: From idea to income in 27 days, led me to as the question that he posed..."What's good and what …

You’ve heard me talking about it, the new podcast, you know the one entitled – Life Uncloseted. I know it’s been a long time coming, and we are almost there. Tentative kick off is October 13th.

But what does it mean to …

Porn gets a bad rap. That's my opinion and I'm not even an avid porn watcher. It's goes in phases for me. But porn has helped me be more me and more comfortable with who I am as a person and sexual being. In fact, I …

Assumptions make an ass out of you and me. Or so that’s what they say. And, in the case of today’s guest, that is what has happened more often than …

The last one is leaving the nest. My youngest is off to college today, and my husband and I become empty nesters...that is provided she or her sister …

Coming out. It can be a challenge but also a celebration. A celebration that makes you want to dance. But, for many of us, the moment we come out, we find ourselves trying to fit in. Fit in within our own community. We …

Coming out is full of emotions. In fact, any journey of change and transformation is laden with baggage filled with emotions. But what if instead of …

Parenting. It’s a labor of love and a love of labor. Now add to the mix, a twist of a same-sex household and all sorts of interesting things begin to …

I have to be honest. Being honest was one of the hardest things I ever learned to do. Ok, maybe I haven't mastered the full art of it yet, but for …

Isolation, loneliness, not fitting in. All are common feelings on the journey to coming out to be one’s self. In the darkest of moments, you may feel …

I’m 54, he’s 50 something. We’re celebrating 200 Episodes of The Coming Out Lounge. He’s celebrating 35 years in the music business rocking the dance …

So what is the difference between self-love and being an arrogant asshole. A lot! It’s just one small step to the right when you move from self-love …

Attention. So hard to grab yet so valuable when you do. For the past six weeks I've been traveling and putting a real effort into trying to pay attention to things happening around me. It's helped me learn stuff about …

He’s a repeat offender, but actually he’s a repeat guest that is back to talk about the art of using Improv to communicate more clearly in the throes of change. Yes, I said Improv when your deep in the tornadoes of …

Today's my birthday, and my gift to you is my perspective on how today and everyday can be your birthday too. I'm keeping it short and sweet this week as I've got some celebrating here to do in Las Vegas, but I just …

It’s time to declare that you have the right to love without judgment! Yes you do. No matter your desires – gay, lesbian, bi, poly – love is love and …

As Dan Savage would say, ITMFA - Impeach The Mother Fucker Already!

As 45 turns the tables on my transgender brother and sisters this week by …

You’re out. Or considering coming out. One of the scariest, most confusing aspects of coming out is whether to be out in the work environment. Some say “yes,” others say “no,” and for others it’s a non-issue.

Regardless …

While attending World Domination Summit over the past weekend, I had the opportunity to confront the fire of shame that fuels my worry. Since I returned, I've been caught up in potential shame that has been inflicted …

So often we get told to “Man up,” or “Act like a lady,” or “Quit being such a cry baby.” All words that cut like a knife, and often times scar us for …

This weekend I was faced with FOMO. Fear of missing out, but in reality I was facing FOBO - Fear of Better Option. I'm attending World Domination Summit in Portland and one of the activities is a food around the world …

From theater dork and film student to non-profit work and dancing her way through Boston, NYC, Europe and Los Angeles, today’s guest finally came …

I've been handed a lot of opportunities in my life. Some good, some not so good. All have given me opportunities to...well you'll just have to listen and find out. However, as you listen to this riff and rant, I invite …

There’s a lot of talk these days about the Trans community…Transgender, Transsexual, Trans-bathrooms…you name it! Trans, trans, trans, has got conversations stirred up all over the globe. Which leads to the question, …

It’s not often we hear the other side of the story. You know the one from the other side of the closet – the spouses story…from the spouse who’s spouse has come out. But today, we once again share what it’s like when …

Who you love, how you love, and how you create your relationships is nobody’s business. Got it? Ok, I know. Easier said than done. Yet, it seems in this day and age there is still an overwhelming societal desire to be …

There comes a point where denying your inner essence leads you to a space of discovering, embracing, and giving yourself permission to be the real …

It’s the eighties in New York City. It’s the blind date of a girl’s dream, a fairy-tale courtship, a magical wedding in a Chelsea loft.

Maggie and John set up house in sleek condo in hip Hoboken. John's a journalist on …

I get asked all the time, “How did your kids take your coming out?” Well instead of me explaining, I thought for Father’s Day it would be an awesome …

Connections. It’s all about connections. Or is it about connecting the dots, or creating connections? The answer is yes, yes, and yes. Without connections, we don’t have compassion. Without connections we can’t …

Today is all about, he said, he said. My friend Joel Barret of Joel Speaks out, OUTwords:LGBTQ Storytelling and Sexual SundaySchool joins me to talk …

We’ve all got a story. It’s our story. The good, the bad, and the ugly, but it’s still our story. Too often though, we are afraid to tell our story, to share our truth. However, the reality is, our story is our truth …

Remember when you were 11 years old? Or maybe not. But for most of us, those younger years were filled with admiration towards older siblings or …

Today is all about good. A good coming out journey, with twists and turns that cover just about every twist and turn you can find in a coming out story. From confusion to rejection, first loves to lasting loves, and all …

At some point in time, someone has told us to get over it, or in more frank terms, "Get over your shit!" I have a different take on this, and I share …

Before you go knocking on the closet door, you might want to consider, NETWORKING. Yes, NETWORKING. In other words, finding some like type folks …

West Los Angeles. Home of the Compton riots and some of the toughest inner city living on the planet. But that didn't stop me, yet as I drove through the neighborhood my courage waned a little bit with each block as I …

Let’s be honest. A majority of us in the LGBTQ world have been told, “You’re going to hell for living that lifestyle.” Oh yeah? Well, who are you to …

Audacity - the willingness to take risks. In my book it's really the willingness to not give a damn what others think and to be yourself. This has showed up in a lot of ways this week - with clients, myself, my kids, …

Imagine living in a town that is literally for all intents and purposes a suburb of Chicago. There’s only one twist…it’s in Indiana. A state where individuals can be fired from jobs for being gay. A state where an …

For the past few weeks I've been listening to Oprah and Deepak Chopra's latest meditation series, "Hope in uncertain times!" It got me think how we can use hope as our guide to come out of our closets to live a rich …

One of the hardest things about coming out of any closet in life, is realizing that the closet door only opens when you truly love who you are fully …

What do you do when you've been dealing with an irrational person? You riff and rant about it on your podcast. And that's exactly what is happening on The Coming Out Lounge podcast today.

I'm giving you a glimpse of my …

It’s been said that life imitates art, but sometimes art imitates life. And that’s exactly where we are going today on The Coming Out Lounge, to a place where art takes us into the provocative life of The Victorians.

Our …

Security. Certainty. Having to know. We all desire some form or feeling secure. Whether it's in ourselves, the future, our relationships, or even in our homes. Security gives a sense of knowing. But what if you can't …

We all are who we are. No getting around that. Even if we put on makeup, false smiles, and act as if we’re really happy, even when we’re not. But, it’s time to take a deeper look into ourselves and embrace that we do …

There's a lot of hubbub these days about the Transgender community. Everything from where they can go pee to whether they should be vanquished off …

Her daughter always caught the boy’s eyes. In return, she knew how to flirt, date, and do everything a normal young lady would do growing up. She was …

Life happens, someone gives you a wrong look, or the shit hits your fan, and BOOM you react! Or, do you respond?

One of the clutches of living a CLOSETED LIFE is living in a reactive state rather than a responsive state. …

You don’t have to be a genius to understand that regardless of your sexual orientation or gender identity, showing your real self to the world can sometimes be a very scary proposition. The fears of rejection and not …

We've all got needs and desires. But one guy on this planet really nutted this concept down to 6 Human Needs. That guy is Tony Robbins and I have to say, when I saw this YouTube Video with his take on the 6 Human Needs …

Two questions that always haunt those of us who come out of the closet later in life are, “How did you not know you were gay?” and “Wasn’t your marriage just sham to protect yourself at your spouse’s expense?” For years …

We've all heard it - "Change your perspective and everything changes!" So if it is that easy then why don't we do it? Often times it is because we don't know how to change our perspective, even if staying in our current …

Glam rock, AIDS, and being yourself. Then imagine being called one of the most iconic queer musicians and you’ve kind of got a glimpse of today’s …

Happy St. Patrick's Day. May your day be filled with everything GREEN, excpet being GREEN WITH ENVY!

Envy is one of those emotions that doesn't do a body good in any way, shape or form. In fact it often destroys us. So …

Coming out is about bringing all sides of yourself to the role you’ve been placed on this earth to play. It’s also about being optimistic and …

My teens favorite response to questions is "I don't know!" Ok, I get it, sometimes we don't know, but is that really true 100% of the time? To often "I don't know" becomes a habitual patterned response so that we can …

We’ve all got a story. A story to uncover, to share, and to help others. Each and every story has purpose. Yet, if we don’t share our stories, or ourselves, and the world doesn’t benefit, and we have less impact, being …

We've all been given a gift. The gift of time. Yes, I know I'm not the first the say that, nor the last. But have you ever considered how time might …

From baseball to ballet. Video games to theater productions. First picked to last picked. And even from “A’s to F’s” we are who we are because of messages we received on the playgrounds of our lives. Messages that …

You gotta itch that needs scratching. It's something you desire and want. But in your lovely little mind you find yourself saying, "When the time is right..." Ok. Fine. Wait for the right time. So you wait and then …

Let’s talk about sex. Or love. Or relationships. And while we’re at it lets address guilt, shame, frustrations, abusive relationships, and STD’s. YES! We’re talking about all those things that sometimes feel yucky and …

You've probably heard the phrase, "You are not your thoughts!" Or maybe, you heard, "You are what you think!" Both are correct, but it is hard for us to wrap our head around that concept. With over 70,000 thoughts …

Imagine being in the national spotlight. In The Real World (yes that one on MTV). You’re a frat boy who’s simply cuter-than-cupid and to start that next chapter of your life. So what is one such as he supposed to do? …

If I had never been curious, I might never have come out of the closet.
If I had never been curious, I wouldn't have risked becoming an entrepreneur
If …

No matter what life hands you, you have within you the spirit to rise, to rewrite the outcome of your story and to create a life filled with love and happiness. That is if you choose to do so. At age 13, today’s guest …

I'm airing my dirty laundry so to speak. This happened because I realized I'm kind of a reaction junkie. Yes, I think I'm a little bit addicted to reacting versus responding. Although, both serve great purposes in our …

Just for a moment imagine you’re a highly sought after photographer, shooting for media outlets such as the BBC, BuzzFeed, National Geographic Traveler, USA Today, and Yahoo – among others. You’re even one of Maria …

Each day I ask myself, "How can I serve?" Some days my answer is, "You can't because you aren't serving yourself!" Now that may sound selfish, but it's so true - if we can't serve ourselves we can't serve others!

When we …

Here’s story about a military guy who had a secret. One that caused him to question his values, kept him up at night, and caused him to pretend to be someone he wasn’t. Yet, he did his duty. Lived by the expectations. …

God Bless America. Heck, bless the whole world for that matter. It's Inauguration day here in the U.S. and like it or not Donald Trump is our new …

Envision the beat of Madonna’s “Vogue” pulsing in the background of your Madonna themed bah mitzvah and the way you’re dancing gives all eyes …

OMG. This box of cords is a mess. No, I can't find what I'm looking for because it's a tangled web of...UUUUGGGGHHHH!

Ever been there? I was, just today and that's why I'm challenging you to look at the boxes of cords …

It may be called Tinsel Town, but it can also be one of the most homophobic, “Don’t ask don’t tell” places on earth…that is if you want to keep working. But those times are changing and like most the rest the world, …

It's here. The first week of 2017 is practically over and we're moving full steam ahead into the New Year. Starting with this episode, we're changing …

The United States and the world as we know it changed dramatically on November 8, 2016. November 9th, we woke up to a nightmare – a white, mostly male, republican party driven, misogynistic, xenophobic, homophobic, …

It's inevitable. The year comes to an end and the new one starts. Just like clockwork, or should we say calendar work. So what do we do? We celebrate …

Imagine being lost, unable to fit in, constantly being bullied, and suffering anxiety and depression. For some of you this may be your life – in and …

Yes, we still live in a world where being out of the closet can mean the difference between life and death, having a job or being canned, and …

We’re back with the continuation of a discussion with Stephanie Poole, Male-to-Female, transgender. In the first episode Stephanie shared his/her …

We’ve all heard the saying, “You’re going to keep being taught the lesson, until you learn it.” Not sure today’s guest needed to learn a lesson, but she’s had plenty of lessons learned in her 50+ years here on the …

As wise man once said, “Coming out is one of the most spiritual experiences a human being can ever have!” Yet, in that process, many LGBTQ individuals find themselves disconnected from their religion, faith, and inner …

It's inevitable. The holidays are here and there's no escaping them. Well I guess you could if you choose to go into some altered state of some other …

We’ve all got coming out stories. That’s what I preach, that’s what I teach, and that’s what I help people do is come out with their truth. But as a man, I’d have to admit, if it were true that my boner was broken, I’d …

You never stop coming out. And, that isn’t just a mantra for the LGBTQ community. It’s a mantra for life. So for a moment imagine being on a path, doing the thing you think you’re supposed to be doing, and then someone …

One of the things we all need as we come out to be our true selves – regardless of our sexual orientation – is a safe, welcoming space. Often that comes in the form of a community of like-minded individuals. But too …

It’s no secret that America’s recent Presidential Election sent got a lot of us scratching our heads, saying, “What the FUCK just happened?” And for others it sent a cry of jubilation across the country because they …

The song lyrics say, “A kiss is just a kiss.” But how true is that? What if that kiss is unwanted? Suddenly, a sense of danger or helplessness rears …

No one coming out story is alike. The pain, the fears, the truth, are all individual. Each with its own heart wrenching story, and heartwarming lessons to be learned. Yet, often times, what ignites the coming out story, …

Imagine. Joan Crawford, of Mommie Dearest fame, being your mother and you announcing to her…”Mommie, mommie I’m gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender…” what might happen. Then imagine the real message she want’s you to …

Change is inevitable. Suffering is optional. In a week where fear, angst, and worry are all top of mind for LGBTQ individuals as well as women, Muslims, African Americans, Hispanics, and the list goes on...the one …

There’s a saying that women should be seen but not heard. Well, that’s ridiculous, archaic, and downright infuriating. It’s also that type of …

Yes, being LGBTQ is all about sex. Wrong! It’s about being the real you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be sexy, and love yourself, your whole self …

The moment you discover your sexual orientation, align with your gender identity, or decide that you’re just going to take a stand to be who you are, you’ve stepped into the arena of diversity. Yup even if you’re not …

One of the things most of us don’t realize is when we come out of the closet, we just might spark a burning flame – and I don’t just mean our LGBTQ flame. The flame I’m talking about is the flame to have our own voice…a …

Just because the doctor said, “It’s a boy,” or “It’s a girl,” doesn’t mean you have to or should buy into that notion, until you’ve determined it’s …

Let’s be honest. A majority of LGBTQ individuals find themselves at the crossroads of their faith and their sexuality. In fact, most of us, find that faith often condemns us to a life of living in sin…or at least that’s …

Do you ever feel like you’re on the relationship merry-go-round, the “same situation, just a different face?” Gets tiring, doesn’t it? So let’s fix that, and fix it now as you step out of the closet and step into your …

Fear, angst, and worry. All of this crippling emotions get in the way of being able to see clearly when we start to realize..."it's time to come out!" Regardless of what you are coming out of, you end up finding …

In Episode 110 we began the journey with Emily Reese as she discovered her husband was gay. The heartache, confusion, and questioning that often comes when you realize you’re gay, is the same emotions a spouse feels …

The words ring out, “Frankly My Dear I’m Gay!” Or, maybe you discover history on the computer to websites you know you didn’t visit. Regardless of the way you finally hear the truth from your spouse, you’re never quite …

You're hiding. The mask is on. You want to be more than what you are. Yet, the fears of the unknown and disappointing others, haunt you and keep you frozen in a life that isn't serving you. Regardless of your coming our …

Imagine having the support to draw boundaries. The kind of boundaries that say, “I love you, respect you, but you don’t get to abuse me in this …

One of the greatest fears for gay men, and many in society, is contracting HIV. Yet, there is an answer. An answer that is controversial – in and outside of the gay community. Rather than wrap hate around a pointed …

His character, and the rest of the cast may have caused a few hearts to throb and a few “To the rights” to want to send them to hell, but the truth …

Fiercely You: Be Fabulous and Confident by Thinking Like a Drag Queen, by Jackie Huba is going to help you step up to the plate of being fiercely …

You may not have to be LGBTQ to love, or to tolerate, but the truth is, you sure get your own big doses of both when you come out of the closet. …

For many of us, our faith and our sexuality are the two things that kept us in the closet because they didn’t know how to play nicely in the sandbox of life. Then, often by some fate of chance, the novels of our lives …

Some call it your soul speaking to you. Others say it’s your calling. And then there are those who say we simply dance to our own beat. Yup it’s the …

Welcome to the 101st Episode of The Coming Out Lounge. It's our first bi-weekly, yes, twice a week episode. In an effort to meet the needs of our Coming Out Lounge family, we are going to start delivering episodes twice …

Coming out can be challenging, joyous, a pain in the ass, and a downright giggle fest when you’ve got the right mindset and cocktails handy. So let’s get to the funny side of coming out with actor (occasionally an …

Why do we hurt? Hurt each other, when we are more alike than different. From Sandy Hook, Charleston, South Carolina, Orlando and Dallas, it seems we …

He knows who he is. He trusts himself. And he’s just fine…especially when he lets his inner diva and drag persona Capria Luchia out of the closet to play. But getting comfortable with himself took a little doing, and …

We’ve all heard about Hollywood’s dirty little secrets. Everything from who’s screwing who, to the latest face lifts and boob jobs. But the really …

You’re out, dating, mating, or just hooking up. Things are going smooth, awful, or so, so. Yet the same broken wheel keeps rolling along. Maybe …

Lights, camera, action. Instead of hiding, I want you to imagine, putting your LGBTQ self out there on the big screen or stage, and not being ashamed of who you are. You are a star. A bright shining star, and worthy of …

As of today, there are 19 states where gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgenders have workplace protections in place that prevent them from being fired based on their sexual orientation, and gender identity. There are …