Cover art for podcast Kiss Your Franchise Goodbye

Kiss Your Franchise Goodbye

141 EpisodesProduced by Andy WilsonWebsite

A movie podcast about film franchises, their ups and downs, franchises that worked, franchises that failed, franchises that never were.

141 Episodes | 2020 - 2023

Babe

November 26th, 2023

1:12:35

We're starting our trio of alt-holiday films with the talking pig classic, Babe. Why Brooke chose this movie. 1990s Provo Mormon prohibitions on PG13 …

Bull Durham

November 20th, 2023

1:39:10

There IS crying in baseball, especially for Rangers fans, and especially with this movie. It's Melissa's birthday movie! And Mark is back! The romanticism of minor league baseball. Welcome to Wrexham.


And finally, our …

Scream VI

November 13th, 2023

1:32:56

It's Scream 6 and the end (for now) of the Scream franchise. Brooke has 30 seconds to summarize all of her problems with this movie.

We rank all of the films and Melissa updates us with her Smash or Pass of all the …

Scream V

October 31st, 2023

1:33:38

It's a re-quel, or whatever the kids are calling it these days. Why this movie totally rules, and fixes/elevates some of the problems from Scream 3 …

Scream 4

October 23rd, 2023

1:22:14

Like the scream franchise, we're back from a break and ready to talk this return! Isn't this like what Scream 3 was supposed to be? Why do people hate this movie? Who guessed the ending? Lack of progress on racial …

Scream 3

October 3rd, 2023

1:36:11

It's Scream 3, it's October, welcome to official spooky season! (Also, Go Rangers!) Wes Craven's use of rape, specifically children who are a product of rape being evil. Carrie Fisher! Andy can't remember Clive Barker's …

Scream 2

September 25th, 2023

1:20:43

It's Scream 2 and Andy, Brooke and Melissa are... talking baseball? Also sequels. And how this is the most stacked supporting cast in the history of sequels... except maybe Sharknado 2. Treatment of Black characters in …

Scream

September 20th, 2023

1:55:48

New series! Why this is the most Xennial movie ever. Intergenerational trauma and absent parents, absent adults. Kevin Williamson, Wes Craven, and …

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

September 11th, 2023

1:41:27

We say goodbye to Indy with a few tears but lots of analysis, and tangents about dating and patriarchy and legacy like you wouldn't believe! We also …

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

August 29th, 2023

1:58:41

It's the Indy movie we've been putting off and here we are finally. The film's treatment of its Indigenous people. Indy getting older. What are the …

Barbie

August 18th, 2023

2:16:39

Hi Barbie! An all-Barbie episode featuring Brooke, Melissa, Kitt, returning from her previous guest spots Kelly, and Brooke's Skipper-- Pru! Welcome Barbies! Barbie and the Rockers Ken!

Opening and closing music from …

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

August 8th, 2023

1:36:32

It's Kitt's birthday movie pick-- the 2013 Ben Stiller film The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Why Brooke hates Ben Stiller (but not in this movie). How we Mitty'd out of this movie several times. Major Tom/David Bowie. …

Indiana Jones and the Daddy Issues, er, Last Crusade

July 31st, 2023

1:49:28

Special guest Christi joins us! How "Isolation Playhouse" script readings kept us sane during the pandemic. Everyone saw this in theaters! Some of …

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

July 25th, 2023

1:40:30

Indy's back (and so are we!) and most of the crew is back together fresh off our Barbenheimer viewings. History with this movie. PG-13. The sexism and Willie. The racism. But also? This movie has some great stuff-- the …

Raiders of the Lost Ark

June 5th, 2023

1:43:47

Don't look Marion! It's Raiders of the Lost Ark, and we have Joe from Tales from the Comic Shop with us. Indy/Star Wars merch nostalgia minute. Melissa is extra salty this week-- we talk briefly about the Texas Rangers. …

Saturday's Warrior Watch-Along Commentary

May 29th, 2023

1:55:56

Watch along with us on YouTube with the Hard to Find Mormon Movies channel.

And we're sorry.

We also take a tiny break right before the "Line Upon Line" song and hit pause for a few minutes. But we tell you when we …

Saturday's Warrior

May 29th, 2023

36:31

It's Brooke's birthday so... we watched Saturday's Warrior? We're sorry. You can hear our entire commentary track, too. But here's the short of it. …

Evil Dead Rise

May 20th, 2023

1:14:00

It's Evil Dead Rise, which was just in theaters! Weirdly, we end up not talking about it that much, but instead go offf on long tangents about Scream, woodchippers, and then Brooke reveals her special birthday movie …

Evil Dead (2013)

May 9th, 2023

39:44

Andy, Melissa and Brooke are OVER this one. How did they make the tree rape WORSE? Diablo Cody? The Final Girl trope. No clever sign off because we're just so done.


Next time it's Evil Dead Rise, which is now available …

The Cabin the the Woods

May 4th, 2023

1:32:56

A quick Evil Dead Rise review! All about Joss Whedon (and Drew Goddard!) Separating art from artist, but... hoo boy. Fran Kranz as Whedon self-insert. MGM's financial troubles and the delays of the movie. Bad test …

Tucker and Dale vs Evil

April 10th, 2023

1:03:25

It's an Evil Dead-adjacent movie, Tucker and Dale vs Evil. The cabin looks like the cabin from Evil Dead! And the inside is like every other horror movie! And coupons for 2 for $3 chili dogs-- no limit! And all the …

Army of Darkness

April 4th, 2023

1:10:15

All right you primitive screwheads, listen up! It's time for Army of Darkness and boy are people mad!

Army of Darkness: "You once found me funny."

Evil Dead II

March 27th, 2023

54:17

What... what IS this movie? Confusing beginning. Horror vs Horror Comedy. Which do we like better? Sam Raimi's use of women characters.


Next week it's Army of Darkness! Groovy!

--- Send in a voice message:

The Evil Dead (1983)

March 21st, 2023

1:13:23

New season, new franchise! It's The Evil Dead, Sam Raimi's splatterfest cabin in the woods original! Why did Melissa want to do this franchise? What is everyone's experience with these movies? Content and Trigger …

69th Episode Nice Princess Season Wrapup Awards and Oscars Presented by Jeffrey Katzenberg, Co-Founder of Quibi

March 14th, 2023

1:16:57

It's our 69th (nice) and final episode of Season 2!

Oscar predictions and thoughts. Why Brooke didn't and JB did like Top Gun: Maverick. 


JB's Top "a-Ha!" moments! 

JB's best and worst movies -- one of which makes …

Creed III

March 8th, 2023

2:02:59

It's Creed 3 baby! It's NOT spoiler-free! Please don't listen unless you've seen the movie. How we watched this movie: Cinemark vs. Regal vs. Alamo Drafthouse. Mr T's Treat Your Mother Right 

Brooke's take via the power …

Creed II

February 28th, 2023

1:23:59

Creed vs Drago, and the winner is all of us! Again, we all love this movie. Dinner scenes. Phylicia Rashad, Tessa Thompson, and BRIGITTE!! Dads and babies. Embarrassing Russian lessons with Andy. Weird tangents at the …

Creed

February 22nd, 2023

1:14:58

It's Creed! Is the best Rocky movie actually Creed? Ryan Coogler. Check out the Patreon for our discussion on Fruitvale Station. Check out Roy on Yours, Mine, and Theirs.

Creed II is next!

--- Send in a voice …

Grave of the Fireflies

February 13th, 2023

1:09:59

One of the saddest movies we've ever covered- perfect for JB's birthday! In the waning days of World War II, two siblings, Seita and Setsuko, are orphaned and struggle to survive. Melissa offers a specifically spicy …

Rocky Balboa

February 6th, 2023

1:23:47

It's the sixth and final Rocky film, and we have another fight on our hands! Is it just boring, or is it artsy? Is it just trying too hard to be artsy? (Don't worry, kids. We all still love each other very much, even …

Rocky V

February 2nd, 2023

1:28:28

We've got a fight on our hands as Brooke kind of loves this movie and Roy, Andy and Melissa do NOT. By the end we're comparing it to other famous …

Rocky IV

January 23rd, 2023

2:27:25

It's Rocky IV and Andy doesn't understand Roman numerals. The whole gang is back including Roy Fillmore and he and Andy promise not to talk about the …

Rocky III

January 16th, 2023

2:05:16

Our prediction? PAIN as Roy Fillmore from Yours, Mine and Theirs joins us again. This is the template movie for everything else. Adrian is the best. …

Rocky II

January 9th, 2023

1:44:57

Roy is back for a rematch talking Rocky II!  The nueroscience of changing from southpaw to righty. Stallone's injury. "You're great!" subtitle. Twitter mail to Creed! Socioeconomics and gender norms of "the man …

Lords of Flatbush Trailer - Listen on Patreon!

January 7th, 2023

2:28

We're launching our Patreon with movies too spicy for the main feed. Hear this two minute preview as Andy and Brooke talk the Rocky-adjacent film The Lords of Flatbush, but we also talk about the history of condoms, the …

Rocky

January 1st, 2023

1:53:39

We're joined by Roy from Yours, Mine and Theirs, where he and Andy also talked about Rocky two years ago! Roy, Brooke and Andy think this is probably the best live action franchise ever. JB disagrees, as there's a lot …

Lady Vengeance

December 31st, 2022

1:59:28

The two old boys are back to talk about Lady Vengeance? (Everyone is back next time for Rocky-- we promise!) It's a Christmas movie? Decision to …

Dirty Rotten Franchise

November 28th, 2022

1:26:26

It's a Melissa birthday pick with the Michael Caine/Steve Martin two-hander Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. We just need some happiness and joy. Steve Martin's kinesthetic acting. Michael Caine's oily hair... or is it crusty? …

State of the Franchise 2022 - Our 100th Episode!

November 23rd, 2022

1:24:23

Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye! Andy is here to lay down the Robert's Rules of Order and lay this episode on the table.

The state of the franchise is …

Toy Story 4

November 4th, 2022

2:16:38

It's the final Toy Story film! Should we start a Patreon/OnlyFans? Brooke's wine pairing and horoscope reading. Is this the best one somehow? We all …

Toy Story 3

October 25th, 2022

2:09:07

The toys are back in town. Not since... has there been such a trilogy! We love this movie, but we spend an hour absolutely savaging it. Spanish Mode …

Toy Story 2

October 17th, 2022

1:40:44

The Godfather II of animated movies? We’re all just toys in Andy’s toybox. This was Brooke’s first time watching this. Our histories with the movie. The most Andy has ever cried at a movie. The intense pressure and …

Toy Story

October 4th, 2022

1:40:07

ANDY'S COMING! EVERYONE HIDE! We talk about the first Toy Story movie and why we love this franchise. The long history of Pixar and John Lasseter- watch The Pixar Story on Disney+. Only men made this movie? SHOCKING. …

Turning Red

September 29th, 2022

3:22:27

It's our longest episode ever! as we discuss Turning Red, boy bands, parenting, and generational trauma.  Then we then go through our wrap up of Disney Princesses and rankings. Post credits interview with Aaron "Bear …

Encanto

September 15th, 2022

2:31:39

We're going to talk about Bruno. Melissa is joining us from a submarine? (Stay to the end for the bloopers where you can hear the submarine dive). Which family member are we and why is it Luisa? Lots of talk about …

Raya and the Last Dragon

September 2nd, 2022

1:32:22

It's a princess movie about. . . COVID? The world is broken but we're here to talk about all the ways Disney tried to do something new and different and groundbreaking here, but also a discussion about how it's a step …

Frozen 2

August 21st, 2022

2:13:58

It's Disney's first theatrical animated sequel, and what a doozy! The billion and a half dollar behemoth with an anti-colonialist subtext? We have …

Coco

August 16th, 2022

3:23:12

Okay, so this our longest episode ever at over 3 hours, and EVERYBODY CRIES. Sorry, not sorry. Special bonus appearance by James Estrada at about the 1:30 mark. Special bonus Mexican box office discussion around 2:15.

Everything Everywhere All At Once

August 3rd, 2022

2:09:57

It's Andy's birthday so we're watching his favorite movie of 2022. Special guest James Estrada from Geek Parenting Podcast joins us, and you can check out his Twitch streams here. Why this movie works. Nietzsche. …

Moana

July 28th, 2022

1:50:29

It's Moana! and we have lots of opinions. First time watcher for Melissa. Memories of seeing this in the theaters. Stupid coconuts. Stop sending people on these 2 week vacations to places! How does one get on a Disney …

Frozen

July 19th, 2022

2:22:26

Disney goes "woke" with the whitest people you know? Or just a story about sisters. The long history of Frozen starting in the 1940s, and including what happens when you put different people in charge of writing and …

Labyrinth

July 13th, 2022

1:37:49

We're all still sick with COVID (get back to us on that sponsorship, Mucinex) but let's talk about Jim Henson's/David Bowie's Labyrinth! Why Kitt bought this on VHS with their own money. Gaslighting: the movie and the …

Brave

July 5th, 2022

1:23:05

Aka the episode where everyone is sick. Somehow JB spread COVID via the podcast and we're all recovering. But let's talk about Brave! And Brenda …

Tangled

June 27th, 2022

2:14:55

It's the story of... Flynn Rider? How is this not Rapunzel's story!?!? We break down why Brooke hates this so much, along with long discussions about emotional abuse and gaslighting. The Philadelphia Story! JB shows up …

Enchanted

June 14th, 2022

1:49:03

We've been dreaming of a true love's kiss and this movie that tries to have it both ways with princess tropes. It is, however, enchanting, as is Adele Dazeem, who inexplicably doesn't sing in this movie at all (Kitt has …

The Princess and the Frog

June 10th, 2022

2:18:11

It's The Princess and the Frog and we welcome Sandee Moore back from her previous appearance and Kitt is now back as a regular princess contributor.

Demolition Man

June 2nd, 2022

1:37:10

We're back and ready to explain the three seashells with this movie that will totally be your boggle. Enhance your calm as we talk about how this movie went through development hell, had 5 different writers, and almost …

Louise by the Shore

May 25th, 2022

1:47:16

It's a birthday choice for Brooke, who chose the animated French 2016 film Louise by the Shore, a surrealist contemplation on aging, memory and …

Lilo and Stitch

May 16th, 2022

2:14:49

On this episode, Ohana means podcast, and that means Andy forgot to include his actual ohana in the recording, so stick around for special time with his sibling Kitt at the end. (Kitt is also going to start joining us …

Robin Hood

May 9th, 2022

2:37:32

Ooo-da-lally! Disney's take on the Robin Hood story is the best filmed version of Robin Hood. Welcome to professor of ethics and philosophy Ammon Allred to help us answer the existential question Little John asks at the …

Mulan

May 2nd, 2022

1:47:30

We're back to give a queer take on Mulan and make Ted Cruz, Ron DeSantis and Ben Shapiro cry. Donny Osmond. Who is Jeffrey Katzenberg? The voice cast …

The Hunchback of Notre Dame

April 25th, 2022

1:43:29

We're back and we're mad about this movie. HELLFIRE! Or are we mad? Maybe just bored. A brief word about the history of the Romani people. We do not use the g-word when referring to them, but we do quote directly from …

Pocahontas

April 11th, 2022

2:00:59

We welcome Ruth Young, who has been to every county in Utah, as we tackle Disney's attempt at a biopic that in no way reflects the actual life of the people they were trying to portray. We say goodbye to Jeffrey …

Aladdin

March 22nd, 2022

2:26:38

Andy really likes this movie but is going to complain about it for 2 1/2 hours. Robin Williams. Jeffrey Katzenberg (co-founder of Quibi) and the ruining of this movie. Howard Ashman's death. The problems with Tim Rice …

Beauty and the Beast

March 14th, 2022

2:19:56

Kelly Adams rejoins us as we start talking about, what else, that library, tho. Kelly loves this movie. Andy loves this movie. Brooke keeps hearing Melissa's voice in her head, or her head in her... something, we don't …

Lil Mermaid Round 2: Return to the Podcast

March 7th, 2022

2:15:29

Melissa is back! And Jon and Roy from Yours, Mine and Theirs are here. (NOTE: To understand some of the jokes and repeated references in this episode, Jon ate some cornbread on camera and we talked about Brooke's …

The Little Mermaid

February 28th, 2022

1:57:04

Listener discretion advised on this one because the conversation goes in some... interesting directions. But we're back! Tonal difference from Hannibal to Disney. Mads-curious. The history of Disney post Sleeping Beauty …

The End of Hannibal -- Hannibal Season 3 / Hannibal Rising

December 21st, 2021

2:15:00

Gaelen is back for Act 3 of the show she calls "Mindf@#$ing in Three Acts"-- it's most mindf@#$ery that ever was!!! The censors were totally not paying attention. We talk about Hannibal Rising for 30 seconds and that's …

Hannibal Season 2

November 27th, 2021

1:54:48

Happy Thanksgiving! And we have the most seasonally appropriate television show of all time, Hannibal, and its second season. We're joined by Mads superfan Gaelen again (from our Casino Royale episode). And Brooke is …

Barfi!!

November 16th, 2021

1:17:35

We're taking a break from serial murderers to celebrate Melissa's birthday-- and we're watching Barfi!! It's available on Netflix and is so …

Hannibal Season 1

November 14th, 2021

2:11:55

In a first, we're covering a tv show? And it's in so many ways better than some of the movies. Bryan Fuller. The triad of Hannibal, Will, and Jack. …

No Time To Die

November 3rd, 2021

1:50:35

Remember when we were a James Bond podcast? Well, here we are! The 25th official Bond movie (and technically the 49th episode of Season 1) and we're all here to talk about it. THERE ARE SPOILERS, and we talk about the …

Red Dragon

October 18th, 2021

1:37:35

It's the final Anthony Hopkins performance as Hannibal Lecter in the remake of Manhunter. Brett Ratner. Milli Vanilli biopic ideas. A wild Melissa appears! Is this movie better than Manhunter? Lesbian porn. Andy is …

Candyman 2021 (and no spoilers quick No Time to Die!)

October 12th, 2021

1:32:45

You can tell we were meh about this movie we took forever to talk about it. To hear about Candyman, go directly to minute 20. Before that? Intros. People are slinging fire on this episode. "Spin the Black Circle." …

Free Guy

October 10th, 2021

1:58:26

We take a weird random turn to talk about a movie about franchises versus new, original intellectual property. "Original" but not really? Are we …

Hannibal

September 26th, 2021

1:50:19

It's time for the eponymous episode. Misunderstanding Clarice Starling. The most dude-bro movie yet. Clarice the tv show. Hannibal is a dirty old …

The Silence of the Lambs

September 17th, 2021

1:53:25

This isn't the first classy, Oscar-winning movie we've covered, even though Andy says it is. The boys are seeing a different Dr. Lecter than the women. Jack Crawford is a bad man. Andy has never seen Rambo II. We all …

Manhunter

September 7th, 2021

1:44:17

We hunted the man, and we found not only director Michael Mann, but also Mark! He's back to talk about why he loves Hannibal and tell us stories of …

Candyman: Farewell to Flesh and Day of the Dead (don't watch these terrible sequels)

August 30th, 2021

1:32:42

These movies are terrible. But we explain exactly what happens in them? Sort of. 

Special thanks to D9 for the music in this episode.

Also, news about what we're doing next! (Spoiler: it's Hannibal time! Next week, …

Candyman (1992)

August 26th, 2021

1:53:46

Say his name five times in a mirror, and the Candyman will murder you. We really enjoyed looking back on this film before the new one comes out. Thanks, Brooke!

Also thanks to Andy's brother Dan, aka D9, for his music! …

Straight Talk and Joyful Noise

August 11th, 2021

1:35:23

It's a Dolly Double Feature, but sadly these movie are not great. Andy's follow-up feelings on Ted Lasso. Melissa has gigabit internet. And calls JB …

Summer Franchise Rundown Delta Variant Edition

August 3rd, 2021

2:14:10

Taking a break from Dolly to talk about what's keeping us sane and making us happy (or in a few cases confounded and angry) in all things franchises. …

Steel Magnolias

July 26th, 2021

1:49:22

Danielle joins us! You should watch her stream on Twitch at twitch.tv/thewitchofthewood. Both Brooke and Danielle have performed Steel Magnolias on …

Rhinestone

July 11th, 2021

2:06:06

RHINESTONE!! Roy and Jon join us from Yours, Mine, and Theirs: they reviewed this with Mark last year. Andy loves that episode because Mark flips tables over the Chuck Norris movie Top Dog. Listen to it here! We …

The Best Little *Podcast* in Texas

June 23rd, 2021

1:33:09

Content Warning: LANGUAGE. Steve Rogers would have a real problem with this episode. Folks, we've got a problem. We've got a WHOREHOUSE, right here …

9 to 5

June 14th, 2021

1:41:11

Dolly and Lily Tomlin ARE Disney Princesses. Why isn't this on Disney Plus? Melissa erased her VHS copy. MAGNETS. We need a copy because we got the …

Sleeping Beauty

June 1st, 2021

1:48:41

We're so happy to have Dr. Sarah Hanisko on this episode! You should listen to Geek Parenting Podcast and watch her on Twitch at

Alice in Wonderland

May 26th, 2021

1:31:37

Featuring special guest Kelly from the Animanicast-- the world's biggest fan of the Mad Tea Party ride at Disney. Our favorite Disneyland rides. Mark wonders if this is like that "Alice in Underpants" movie he saw? We …

Cinderella

May 19th, 2021

1:39:35

We're all back and we are all celebrating our animal versions in the movie. The 1977 porn version? Mark wants to know why no pants? Mark has lots of weird hot takes on this movie. Disney almost goes bankrupt--again. The …

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

May 13th, 2021

1:35:39

Brooke loves Snow White. JB hates Snow White. Andy has lots of Snow White facts. Who will win? Feminism-- let's get some men in here to discuss it! Is this movie more problematic or secretly feminist? Walt Disney was …

Blade Trinity

May 4th, 2021

1:19:23

This movie is hot garbage. Signed, Blade. On a Post-It note. The David Goyer rabbit hole. Who choked who? Racism? He had it comin'! Misogyny and …

Blade 2 and Oscars 2021

April 28th, 2021

1:46:39

Oscar talk! Wolfwalkers vs. Soul. Movie gift baskets. Top Pixar movies. Why we love Wolfwalkers. Anti-colonialism. Should we do a Cartoon Saloon …

Blade

April 23rd, 2021

1:44:29

Welcome to Season 2! We're talking about Blade, the 1998 Wesley Snipes vampire Marvel movie. Reactions when this movie came out. The history of Marvel in movies. David Goyer. Wesley Snipes. Studio notes. Next week is …

The Power of One

April 15th, 2021

1:56:04

Content/Trigger Warning: racism, Apartheid, violence and abuse, especially towards children and animals. We're discussing Daniel Craig's first …

Atomic Blonde

April 8th, 2021

2:17:35

It's the penultimate episode of Season 1 as we wrap up Bond by asking, "What if Bond, but Charlize Theron?" Starting with Europe / Peter Schilling. …

SPECTRE

March 30th, 2021

1:31:25

Mark has a bone to pick with Andy and JB for being mean to SPECTRE. But first, Batwoman talk. Long tracking shots. Sam Smith. Should this have been …

The Man from U.N.C.L.E.

March 26th, 2021

1:28:40

We're distracted by our cameras. Vaccine showdown: Pfizer vs. Moderna! Cannibalism chat!  Armie Hammer is maybe just a psychopath. And a rapist.

The …

Skyfall

March 18th, 2021

1:57:43

A word about Irish Nachos. We all love Skyfall. Sam Mendes as a director, Auteur Theory. Silva is the best villain. We love Eve Moneypenny. Albert Finney. Shooting for China and the int'l box office. A long discussion …

Dead Man

March 2nd, 2021

1:56:06

It’s a special JB birthday episode as we talk about the 1996 Jim Jarmusch black and white western DEAD MAN. No, it’s not a superhero movie. It’s the most non-franchise movie ever. William Blake and poetry. Total sausage …

The State of the Franchise 2021

February 9th, 2021

1:28:25

It's our first annual look at the year before us and planning on which franchises we want to talk about through the rest of the year. It's going to be a very feminist year, with women-led films and a lot of surprise …

Good Mark Hunting

February 1st, 2021

2:00:47

JB ruins the podcast again, starting a running joke about penis plates? Why Mark wanted to watch Good Will Hunting. Why these characters are compelling. Chronic pain. The genesis of the script. As Good As It Gets and

Quantum of Solace

January 25th, 2021

1:58:30

Welcome to the first podcast of 2021! JB is here to ruin everything. Delays in the podcast and domestic insurrection. The inauguration. We’re a Chris Gaines podcast now. We’re not mad at the movie, we’re just …

Casino Royale ... with Cheese

December 29th, 2020

2:09:22

We're now a Mads Mikkleson fan podcast, welcoming in Andy's sister Kate, her friend Gaelen, and ReturningChamp™ Melissa as our biggest Mads fans we know. Also JB and Mark are here. (We miss you, Brooke!) 

It's a reboot! …

Merry Christmas, Moviehouse!

December 22nd, 2020

42:04

A special BONUS episode pulled out of the internet time capsule. FOUR YEARS AGO, Dec 21, 2016, Brooke and Andy sat down on another podcast and talked …

Die Another Day

December 10th, 2020

1:20:20

This movie is terrible. Just awful. Andy, Mark, Brooke and JB break it down. Halle Berry, product placement gone wrong, bad villains, Boba Fett and …

Undercover Brother

November 29th, 2020

2:25:55

Special guest Dr. Paul White is here to discuss the blaxploitation-spy-sendup starring Eddie Griffin and Christmas Jones herself.  Sorry for the …

In Remembrance of Sir Sean Connery

November 4th, 2020

1:38:23

We gather to discuss the passing of a legend. We talk about everything, including Connery's statements and history with domestic violence.  Our …

The World is Not Enough

October 13th, 2020

1:02:00

The World is Not Enough. . . it's simply sort of "meh." People are mad at Andy's article on Bleeding Cool about Tom Hardy as James Bond. Check out …

Austin Powers

September 29th, 2020

1:50:18

We cover all three movies! (apologies for some audio issues. We blame Kreplackistani rebels.) Lots of memories of 1997, 1999, and 2002. Secret Jamba …

Tomorrow Never Dies

September 25th, 2020

2:16:14

Public service announcement: Everyone should vote! Make sure you're registered: go to HowTo.Vote, brought to you by our partners at Democracy Works.

The Saint

September 14th, 2020

1:34:43

It's The Saint with Val Kilmer! We're all saints, kinda. Andy talks Russia in the 90's. Choosing the girl or the mission. How many spies actually seduce people? Talking Val Kilmer means we end up talking about Batman …

The Simpsons - You Only Move Twice

September 7th, 2020

1:44:23

Provo 1996 memories. When did we fall out of The Simpsons? 

What is the joke? Did Homer see someone throw a show before? Marge should give it a week. …

The Rock

August 31st, 2020

2:01:54

Welcome to The Rock. Semi jokes. A Bond film but not a Bond film. GoFundMe to get everyone high and watch movies. The Fifth Element and Provo memories.

Michael Bay had promise? He cares about if he has a good time.

Ed …

Goldeneye

August 24th, 2020

1:59:11

The amazing Kay-B joins us to tell us we're wrong about Goldeneye and it is not a great Bond movie. We break the gender barrier with more women on …

The Hunt for Red October

August 17th, 2020

2:38:01

This is not a Bond movie, but a response to Bond. Because Sean Connery. How we were all exposed to this movie. The BYU Varsity Cinema editing movies. Cleanflicks.  Melissa kept waiting for Denzel to show up. Mark loves …

License to Kill (nee Licence to Kill)

August 2nd, 2020

2:30:44

We have converts! Danke Bond. Sex Pyramid. Non-latino actors playing Latino characters. 

Great villains. Benecio Del Toro sighting. Is that the one about the hooker with dystentery?

Beating girlfriends. Fridging women. …

The Living Daylights - cool cool cool

July 25th, 2020

2:12:52

Welcome to the cool side of this McDLT, where we have returning champ Melissa, Candice back from her appearance on the Live and Let Die episode, and …

The Living Daylights - Hot Hot Hot!

July 23rd, 2020

2:39:01

Welcome back to Jon and JB from Yours, Mine and Theirs as we channel the 1987 McDonald's classic the McDLT and keep the hot side hot and the cool …

A View to a Kill

July 15th, 2020

2:06:42

It's the end of the Roger Moore era with Christopher Walken and Grace Jones as the baddies in. . .  dollar store knock-off Goldfinger. We welcome …

Top Secret!

July 8th, 2020

1:59:33

It's not James Bond, it's Nick Rivers! (Val Kilmer) Returning champ Melissa is back, as are Jon, Roy, and JB from Yours, Mine and Theirs. Why Top Secret? When is this movie? Great singing! Very specific energy. Kilmer's …

Never Say Never Again

June 29th, 2020

2:11:44

Sean Connery is back! And he should've stayed gone. Returning champ Melissa joins us again.  This is a terrible movie. Why is this movie? and Kevin …

Octopussy

June 22nd, 2020

1:58:44

We're joined by Returning Champion Melissa, who used to do a Doctor Who podcast with Mark and Andy! Her Abuelo loved these movies and she has lots of …

Black Lives Matter

June 14th, 2020

1:47:51

Taking a break from James Bond to acknowledge *gestures vaguely* all of this. Our regular crew welcome a team of some of our favorite Black geeks and …

For Your Ears Only

June 3rd, 2020

1:53:34

Welcome to our partner for June, the Freaky Geeks Podcast, part of the Geek Nerd Network (GNN). Check them out here or wherever fine podcasts are …

The {Blank} {Blank} (Secret Episode!)

May 26th, 2020

1:35:35

It's Brooke's birthday, so we take a break from James Bond to talk about one of her favorite movies ever. Guesses on what that movie is. No one guessed it. Why we love this movie. What's problematic AF about it. Behind …

Moonraker (on Cough Syrup)

May 19th, 2020

1:43:39

Brooke is high on sizzurup and you can tell because she liked Moonraker. We're joined by returning champs Sarah and Doug. Everyone in this movie is two opposite things. Why there are letters on mountains in Utah. Brooke …

The Spy Who Loved Me

May 11th, 2020

1:41:28

Andy serenades us with Nobody Does It Better. Brooke did NOT like this movie while Mark and Andy both think it's the best Roger Moore movie. Is it boring? Cinematography. JAWS! We make a mistake about which Adam Sandler …

The Man With the Golden Gun

May 4th, 2020

1:48:57

Christopher Lee, tho. 20 minutes of us fawning over Christopher Lee and then 20 minutes of us hating on Sheriff Pepper.  The AMC Hornet and the slide whistle. Mitt Romney! The women in this movie are horribly written. …

Zardoz!

May 1st, 2020

1:01:58

Zardoz! (Content and Trigger Warning for this episode: sexual assault and discussion of rape and assault). We blame Mark for making us watch this. …

Live and Let Die

April 20th, 2020

2:15:56

We’re joined by Candace who loves James Bond thanks to her mom. Mr. Big has a big payroll and big revolving door budget. Favorite fashion decades. …

011 - Our Podcast Flint

April 13th, 2020

55:07

Andy and Mark take on Derek Flint (James Coburn) in the Bond-inspired spy movies Our Man Flint and In Like Flint.  More Austin Powers connections.  Derek Flint is a Mary Sue. The Mediocre Seven. A long tangent about …

Diamonds/Connerys are Forever

April 6th, 2020

1:52:02

Jon from Yours, Mine and Theirs is back to talk Diamonds are Forever. He also has a new podcast where he reads audiobooks that don’t exist called …

On Her Majesty's Secret Podcast

March 31st, 2020

2:30:38

George Lazenby - we stan a legend. And we bring in guests Sarah and Doug to talk this movie and cars! The other fellow. Lazenby's history. King of the haymakers. The porn parody. Is Bond Poseidon? No one says no to …

Darby O'Gill and the Little (Mandela Effect) People

March 17th, 2020

1:13:13

QUICK! SOMEBODY CHANGED DARBY O'GILL!! Featuring special guest Dr. Debra! Watch her Ted Talk here! Watch Bond on PlutoTV now. But seriously, Brooke remembers this movie totally differently. It was The Gnome Mobile. …

Casino Not So Royale

March 13th, 2020

1:12:06

Andy and Mark take on the not at all funny "spoof" Casino Royale starring David Niven, Peter Sellers, and Ursula Andress. What even is this movie? …

You Only Live Twice ... aka Ninjas in Volcanoes

March 3rd, 2020

1:22:56

The regular crew is back, Brooke is bored, Mark loves Japanese culture, and Andy is disturbed by screenwriter Roald Dahl. John Barry and the score. …

Thunderball

February 24th, 2020

2:14:16

Welcoming guests old and new-- Roy, JB and now Jon from Your, Mine and Theirs. Why this podcast is called Kiss Your Franchise Goodbye. Star Wars …

Goldfinger

February 20th, 2020

1:53:03

Andy, Brooke and Mark sing a lot about Goldfinger. Trgger warning for rape and sexual assault. That theme song. A duck? Disposable and replaceable …

From Russia With Love

February 11th, 2020

1:52:32

With Special Guests Roy Fillmore and JB Flinders from Yours, Mine and Theirs podcast. Mark is back as our Pedro Armendáriz but Brooke is out sick. Why Andy loves Yours, Mine and Theirs. Living Daylights hate. A-ha vs. …

Dr. No

February 5th, 2020

1:42:42

Andy, Brooke, and Mark take on the first Bond movie, Dr. No. But first, vote on what this season of the podcast should be called by joining our …

Bond, James Bond

January 30th, 2020

1:38:55

Our pilot episode of "Kiss Your Franchise Goodbye" we discuss the history of the Bond films, our best/worst films, Bonds, theme songs, and others. Join host Andy Wilson, Brooke Heym, and Mark De Leon as we begin a …

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