Cover art for podcast Beware of the Leopard: the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy podcast

Beware of the Leopard: the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy podcast

80 EpisodesProduced by Mark Steadman, Jon Bounds, Jon Hickman, Danny SmithWebsite

Jon Bounds, Jon Hickman, Danny Smith and Mark Steadman are writing new additions to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the book with the famous words "Don't Panic" written in large, friendly letters on the cover.This smart, funny podcast fuses real-world observation with a writing style Adams fan… read more

80 Episodes | 2017 - 2021

Christmas in the Shack

December 24th, 2021

20:34

One of the many major problems with producing podcasts is that of who you get to do it, or rather of who manages to get people to let them do it to them. To summarise: it is a well-known and much limited fact that those …

Productivity

October 14th, 2021

1:04:45

Mark, Danny and the Jons present the Hitchhiker’s Guide to getting it all done.

In our new format, each panelist writes a short essay on the given topic, in the style of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the book …

Sleep

June 16th, 2021

1:02:02

Mark, Danny and the Jons present the Hitchhiker’s Guide to getting a good night's rest.

In our new format, each panelist writes a short essay on the given topic, in the style of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the …

Towel Day 2021

May 25th, 2021

43:10

To commemorate Towel Day 2021, Mark, Danny, and the Jons present the worst bits of Beware of the Leopard. These are all the bits that are normally cut from the main body of the episode and shoved to the back, to sit in …

Birthdays and ageing

April 1st, 2021

1:02:50

Mark, Danny and the Jons present the Hitchhiker’s Guide to getting on in years.


In our new format, each panelist writes a short essay on the given topic, in the style of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the book …

Don't Panic! It's Christmas!

December 24th, 2020

48:52

Mark, Danny and the Jons present the Hitchhiker’s Guide to Christmas and the new year.


In our new format, each panelist writes a short essay on the given topic, in the style of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the …

The Don't Panic guide to music

December 10th, 2020

1:05:07

Mark, Danny and the Jons present the Hitchhiker’s Guide to music.


In our new format, each panelist writes a short essay on the given topic, in the style of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the book with the large …

Don't Panic! goes back to school

November 12th, 2020

1:02:12

Mark, Danny, and the Jons present their Hitchhiker’s Guide entries on a return to school, including the long dark teatime of the soul, robot school, …

The Don't Panic guide to sport

August 5th, 2020

52:34

Mark, Danny and the Jons present the Hitchhiker’s Guide to sport, with contributions on politics and PE, and a host of alien sporting activities sure …

Towel Day 2020

May 25th, 2020

1:23:24

Join Mark, Jon, Jon and Danny as they play Podcast Day, the text adventure game written by Mark.

The Dont Panic Guide to the COVID-19 pandemic

April 10th, 2020

1:03:39

Join Mark, Danny and the Jons as they tackle the fiddly social issues that arise from living through a global pandemic.


Each panelist – including Mark – was tasked with writing an entry for an updated version of the

42nd anniversary special

March 8th, 2020

46:03

Join Mark, Danny and the Jons as they recap what they’ve been up to since our last full episode, say goodbye to a fellow Hitchhiker and Adamsify a …

The question to the ultimate answer

April 17th, 2019

1:21:28

Join Mark, Danny and the Jons as they attempt to solve the world’s problems and make it a good and happy place. Jon Hickman turns to pop culture, …

From Zaphod Beeblebrox to Zentalquabula

April 10th, 2019

40:53

Join Mark and the Jons as they finish up the last of the Zs in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Zaphod Beeblebrox

Zaphod Beeblebrox is – or was – President of the Imperial Galactic Government. His favourite mother is …

From the Wormhole Disco to the Zansellquasure Flamarion Bridge Club

April 3rd, 2019

47:27

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they saunter into the Z section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Wormhole Disco

The place Zaphod and Roosta …

From wave harmonic theory to the Wise Old Bird

March 28th, 2019

52:45

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the W section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Wave harmonic theory of historical perception

Reason not withstanding, the universe continues unabated. Its history is …

From Vogons to Walkmans

March 21st, 2019

52:30

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the V section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Vogon constructor fleets

Here is what to do if you want to get a lift from a Vogon: forget it. They are one of the most …

From the Uncertain Areas to Vod

March 14th, 2019

39:14

Join Mark and the Jons as they traverse the V section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, with a quick final stop-off at U.

Uncertain Areas

“Wild horses thundered through the sky taking fresh supplies of reinforced …

From Tri-D to Turlingdrome

March 7th, 2019

41:18

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they clear the T section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Tri-D

Tri-D is Adams’ allusion to some sort of 3D TV, and is distinct from Five-D, the sub-etha, the Sense-o-Tape, the Hall of …

From Thor to Transtellar Cruise Lines

February 28th, 2019

43:53

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the T section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Tea and Douglas

What JB said about kettles isn’t entirely inaccurate, according to an American friend of Mark’s, who also …

From sun diving to Terry Jones

February 21st, 2019

40:22

Join Mark and the Jons as they traverse the [letter] section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Sun dive

Hotblack Deseato’s band has a completely black stunt ship that dives into the sun on Kakrafoon, as part of the …

From Strags to the Sub-Etha Sens-o-Matic

February 14th, 2019

35:59

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the S section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Strag

A strag is a non-hitchhiker. Given that we’ve …

From SrDt 3454 to Stephen Moore

February 7th, 2019

42:42

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the S section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. We dedicate this episode to Jeremy Hardy, who died last week.

The Great Ventilation and Telephone Riots of SrDt 3454


These …

From Slim’s Throat Emporium to Sqornshellous

January 31st, 2019

37:56

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they continue with the S section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Slim’s Throat Emporium

Slim’s Throat Emporium is a bar Ford and Hotblack Desiato used to crash, pretending to be health …

From Striterax to Slartibartfast

January 24th, 2019

49:36

Mark and the Jons are back off their Christmas break and ready to continue through the S section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Silastic Armorfiends of Striterax

The best way to pick a fight with a Silastic …

2018 Christmas special

December 27th, 2018

1:07:00

Join Mark, Danny and the Jons as they ring in 2019 with a Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy pub quiz, in which every single round – every single one – is completely and 100% to do with the Douglas Adams sci-fi universe.

From Sens-o-Tape to the Siderial Daily Mentioner

December 20th, 2018

35:27

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they continue traversing the S section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Sens-o-Tape

Sens-o-Tape is another piece of VR equipment. In the first book, Arthur gets strapped into a machine …

From Saquo-Pilia Hensha to Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha

December 13th, 2018

33:55

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the S section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Saquo-Pilia Hensha

King Antwelm made a famous assumption that what everybody wanted, all other things being equal, was to be …

52: From Rula Lenska to Santraginus V

December 6th, 2018

44:47

Join Mark and the Jons as they finish up the R section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and make a move on the Ss.

Rula Lenska

Rula Lenska …

51: From reverse temporal engineering to Roosta

November 29th, 2018

37:59

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the R section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Reverse temporal engineering

Reverse temporal …

50: Loose tiles vol 1

November 22nd, 2018

36:33

Mark and Jon Hickman welcome Danny back to the Leopard with an episode in which we pull out random letters from the Scrabble bag. Warning: your …

49: From the Radiophonic Workshop to Reg Nullify

November 15th, 2018

37:09

Join Mark and the Jons as they continue through the R section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Radiophonic Workshop

The Radiopohinc Workshop was a BBC department that mae music and noises for BBC programmes, …

48: From President Vranx to radiation swamps

November 8th, 2018

40:57

Join Mark and the Jons as they finish up the P section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and get into some Rs.

President Yooden Vranx

President Yooden Vranx was Zaphod’s predecessor. It was his idea to steal …

47: From politics to Pralite monks

November 1st, 2018

44:02

Join Mark and the Jons as they traverse the P section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Politics

The Jons explain why David Icke is like a …

42: Live at the Birmingham Podcast Festival

July 11th, 2018

52:20

Jon Bounds, Jon Hickman, Danny Smith and Mark Steadman meetup in real life to discuss their favourite characters, put the Guide on shuffle mode and drink a homemade pangalactic gargleblaster.

Huge thanks to everyone …

45: From Philip Pope to Poghril

June 27th, 2018

39:08

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they continue traversing the P section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Philip Pope

Philip Pope recorded a character voice in the Starship Titanic video game, wrote the Krikkit song …

Towel Day special - Part 2

June 20th, 2018

51:39

Join Mark, Danny and Jon Bounds as they play through as much of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy text adventure game as they could. Spoiler: it’s …

43: From Paul McCartney to the Phargilor Kangaroo

June 13th, 2018

37:44

Join Mark and the Jons as they traverse the P section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Paul McCartney

In Life, the Universe and Everything, …

41: From Oolon Colluphid to parties

June 6th, 2018

37:44

Join Mark and the Jons as they traverse the P section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and take a sneaky pitstop at O.

Oolon Colluphid

Towel Day special - Part 1

May 30th, 2018

1:08:19

Join Mark, Danny and Jon Bounds as they play through as much of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy text adventure game as they could. Spoiler: it's …

39: From New York to Old Thrashbarg

May 23rd, 2018

43:13

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the M section of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Towel Day is coming!

Join us on Friday 25th June …

38: From mice to Murray Bost Henson

May 16th, 2018

37:31

Join Mark, Jon and Jon as they traverse the M section of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Mice

Trillian - remember her? - kept some pet mice, who turned out to be the most intelligent beings on earth. We still …

37: From matter transference to memory dumps

May 9th, 2018

37:31

Join Mark, Jon and Danny as they traverse the M section of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Matter transference beams

Ford and Arthur are …

36: From Majikthise to Marvin

May 2nd, 2018

37:30

Join Danny, Jon and Mark as they barrel through the M section of the Guide.

Links

35: From logic to Magrathea

April 25th, 2018

37:30

Danny joins Mark and Jon Bounds to discuss crisps, Sundays and Zeno’s paradox. It’s all in the L section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

34: From Lazlar Lyricon to Lintilla

April 18th, 2018

34:15

Mark and Jon Hickman are joined by Jon Bounds to work through some more of the L section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Lazlar Lyricon

Lazlar Lyricon is a customiser of space craft to the staggeringly …

33: From Krikkit to Lamuella

April 11th, 2018

31:28

Mark and Danny Smith are joined by Jon Hickman to finish up the K section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and tackle a couple of important …

31: From Juju-flop to Know-Nothing-Bozo

April 4th, 2018

34:53

Mark and Jon Bounds are joined by Danny Smith to continue pawing through the J section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Juju-flop

When in a national speech, the financial minister of the Royal World Estate of …

Outtakes vol 1

March 28th, 2018

27:40

In lieu of a full episode this week, here’s volume one of our collection of outtakes and bits that were too rude - or nonsensical - even for this …

30: From Jaglan Beta to Judiciary Pag

March 22nd, 2018

40:08

Mark and Jon Hickman are joined by Jon Bounds to continue pawing through the J section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Jaglan Beta

Jaglan …

29: From the Imperial Galaxy to Islington

March 15th, 2018

35:02

Mark and Danny Smith are joined by Jon Hickman to continue pawing through the H section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide.

Imperial Galaxy

In the last moments of his dying coma, the hereditary Emperor of the Galaxy was locked …

28: From human beings to the Ident-i-Eeze

March 8th, 2018

40:38

Mark and Jon Bounds are joined by Danny Smith to continue pawing through the H section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide.

Human beings

One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about human beings …

27: From the Hooloovoo to Hrundi

March 1st, 2018

36:19

Mark and Jon Hickman are joined by Jon Bounds to continue pawing through the H section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide.

Hooloovoo

A super-intelligent …

26: From Hastromil to Hig Hurtenflirst

February 22nd, 2018

31:30

Mark and Danny Smith are joined by Jon Hickman to continue working thorugh the H section of the Hitchhiker’s Guide.

Hastromil

A star system we can see disappear into the black void of space, at Milliways.

Hawalius

A …

25: From Hactar to the Happy Vertical People Transporters

February 15th, 2018

38:41

Mark and Jon Bounds are joined by Danny Smith to start work on the H section of Douglas Adams’ Hitchhikers’ universe.

Hactar

Hactar is the first computer ever to be shocked. The Silastic Armorfiends of Striterax …

24: From the Grebulons to the G’Gugvuntts

February 8th, 2018

46:45

Mark and Jon Bounds are joined by Jon Hickman to finish rattling through the Gs, including a stop off at the Guide, and some very special found …

23: From Golgafrincham to the greater drubbered wintwock

February 1st, 2018

32:46

Mark and Danny are joined by Jon Hickman to discuss who should end up on the B Ark and understand impossible sentences.

Golgafrincham Ark Fleet

A …

22: From Geoffrey McGivern to Gogrilla Mincefriend

January 25th, 2018

37:21

The team are back for 2018, and continuing their mission to explore the Hitchhiker’s Guide universe in alphabetical order. This week, Danny Smith and …

21: S01E01 watch-along

January 2nd, 2018

1:09:37

In a sort-of belated Christmas special, the full panel of Danny, the Jons and Mark watch series 1, episode 1 of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

20: From the Gagrakacka Mind Zones to Genuine People Personalities

December 21st, 2017

39:42

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon, in alphabetical …

19: From Fortillian Bantoburn O'Perfluous to the Fulornis Fire Dragon

December 14th, 2017

38:28

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Danny Smith continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Fortillian Bantoburn O’Perfluous

The BarBot of the …

18: From Flolloping to Ford Prefect

December 7th, 2017

39:57

Mark Steadman, Danny Smith and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in …

17: From the Fire Mountains of Frazfraga to the Flex-o-Panel

November 30th, 2017

34:38

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Fire Mountains of Frazfraga

We don’t know much about the …

16: From the Evildrome Boozarama to Finlon

November 23rd, 2017

36:08

Mark Steadman, Danny Smith and Jon Hickman continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Evildrome Boozarama

The Evildrome Boozarama is a bar Ford …

15: From Enid Kapelsen to Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Sex

November 16th, 2017

35:56

In a very sexy episode, Mark Steadman, Danny Smith and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Enid Kapelsen

Enid is an elderly …

14: From the earth to the electronic thumb

November 9th, 2017

37:02

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Earth

Earth is a planet that was destroyed five minutes …

13: From dogs to Douglas Adams

November 2nd, 2017

36:59

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Danny Smith continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Warning: This episode contains lots of swearing and sex …

12: From the Definit-Kil to Dire Straits

October 23rd, 2017

36:21

Mark Steadman, Jon Bounds and Danny Smith continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Definit-Kil photrazon cannon

A Vogon weapon, and an excuse …

11: From Cruxwan University to Deep Thought

October 18th, 2017

35:54

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Cruxwan University

The seat of learning that was attended …

10: From Colin to cows

October 11th, 2017

33:46

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Danny Smith continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in …

9: From the Campaign for Real Time to the Cloudworlds of Yaga

October 4th, 2017

34:42

Mark Steadman, Danny Smith and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order. This episode has some bad language.

Campaign for Real Time

8: From Brantisvogan to California

September 27th, 2017

34:22

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Brantisvogan

A many-faceted place where banking and …

7: From Bistro Illegal to body debits

September 20th, 2017

39:04

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Danny Smith continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order. This episode has bad language in it from the start.

Bistro …

6: From Bastablon to biscuits

September 13th, 2017

36:35

Mark Steadman, Danny Smith and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in …

5: From artificial disabilities to Bartledan

September 6th, 2017

35:46

Mark Steadman, Jon Bounds and Jon Hickman continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Artificial disabilities

A medical marvel that can make your …

4: From Argabuthon to Arthur Dent

August 30th, 2017

35:20

Mark Steadman, Jon Bounds and Jon Hickman continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.

Argabuthon

From which planet the plexiglass sceptre of …

Arctura

August 23rd, 2017

36:08

Mark Steadman, Danny Smith and Jon Bounds continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order. This week, it’s everything Arcturan.


Arcturan megadonkey


A …

From Alpha Centauri to Apple

August 16th, 2017

36:36

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Danny Smith continue their mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.


Alpha Centuri


A real star system that might’ve put paid to the …

From Advanced Vectoid Stabilisis to Almighty Bob

August 9th, 2017

37:49

Mark Steadman, Jon Hickman and Jon Bounds embark on a mission to discuss everything in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy canon , in alphabetical order.


Advanced Vectoid Stabilisis


A device you can add to your …

Trailer

July 15th, 2017

2:53

Mark Steadman, ape descendent, is on a mission to discover and discuss everything from the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy , in entirety, and in alphabetical order.

With the help of his friends Jon Hickman, Jon Bounds

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